


The Journey Home From The Unknown

by singilu



Category: EXO (Band)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-02-11
Updated: 2015-02-11
Packaged: 2018-11-13 08:27:49
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 30,506
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11180901
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/singilu/pseuds/singilu
Summary: The Journey Home From The Unknown, Tao/Sehun, NC-17, 30 398 words,-AU, sex in a kind of almost public setting- Sehun has two months to kill before he starts his first full time job, and Tao has a fancy new car. The summer road trip across South Korea seems like a logical course of action.- written for taohunation exchange @LJ, originally postedhere- for a better idea of the course of the road trip: Sehun and Tao left Seoul and traced the east South Korean coast all the way down to Wando, with occasional trips to the inland. They took a ferry from Wando to Jeju and came back the same way, only to trace the west coast on the way back to Seoul.A/N: If you read this fanfiction on taohunation and were confused, chances are you read it in the wrong order, please consider starting over <3 Long ass A/N is to be found at the end of the fic.





	The Journey Home From The Unknown

Tao takes a deep breath and gets out of the car. It's not the first time he's here, but he's kind of hoping it's the last one. The gate in front of him and the wire fence winding into the distance make him anxious. Tao leans against the driver's door and watches the gate, thinking of how Sehun will look like when he finally gets out for good, how changed he will be on the outside and on the inside. Two years―Tao hadn't realized just how long that could be. He wonders now if he can ever fathom how much have changed.

It's not like he hasn't seen Sehun at all during the time Sehun spent doing his mandatory military service. Sehun has had couple of vacations, and Tao has come to see him. But the vacations were always short and dedicated to family and meeting all his friends, and Tao's not a Korean citizen so he always needed someone to come with him if he went to visit. Besides, his tendencies to touch Sehun, to run his hand over his shorn off hair and check for any damages, didn't go too well with the atmosphere behind this particular wire fence. Tao can count the times he's been alone with Sehun, has really talked to Sehun, in the past two years on the fingers of one of his hands.

"Have you gone deaf from old age since I last saw you? Blind too?" Tao hears a familiar voice say, and he realizes he's missed the moment Sehun came out of the heavy doors. He doesn't mind. Instead, he focuses on Sehun, standing in front of him, lips turned down at the corners, one very bushy eyebrow raised mockingly.

"I couldn't see you in those awful clothes. You've practically blended in with the surroundings," he says, smiling, and tries to pull Sehun into a hug. Sehun halts though, and it only becomes this odd shoulder bump. Still, his eyes are smiling, even as he looks between his military camouflage pants and dark green t-shirt and Tao's black ripped jeans and white shirt.

"I didn't want to waste time changing. I was so ready to get out of there," he says, chuckling a little darkly. Tao watches Sehun's tongue peek out in a nervous habit of his as he studies Tao a little more. Then his eyes shift to the car behind them. "What's up with the fancy car? Who are you trying to impress?" he asks in the end, and Tao pushes himself off the side of it and walks to open the trunk. Sehun follows, throwing his huge duffel bag into it.

"It was a present. My mother felt it was ridiculous I walked everywhere the last time she came to visit," Tao says. "Do you want to drive?" he asks, and Sehun lights up like a Christmas tree. His face is more rectangular, more mature now, his jaw even sharper, his skin tanned from all the time he's spent outside, and his hair is super short and the most black Tao's ever seen it. His arms are as thick as Tao's in his plain t-shirt, his shoulders are broad and strong, and his hips, as narrow as ever, make them look even wider when Sehun straightens up. But the wide grin and the light in Sehun's eyes, those things are same as two years ago. Tao has missed his best friend, but now Sehun's back, and there's an adventure looming over their heads.

"It's really yours? You'd let me?" Sehun asks, already grabbing for keys.

"As if," Tao mocks and steps back. Sehun launches at him, and damn, he's fast, and his grip on Tao's waist as he jumps after the keys in Tao's outstretched hand is so strong it hurts. Tao is so surprised he actually drops the keys, and Sehun yells in victory. Tao blinks.

"Let's get out of here," Sehun chirps happily. Tao tells himself he meant to let him drive anyway.

"You brat," he mutters.

"You spoiled rich kid," Sehun retaliates. He gets inside, and when Tao joins him on the passenger seat, Sehun is looking around like a little kid on his first fair ride. "I can't believe your mother bought you a Maserati. Just like that," he says. "Sometimes I forget you're actually filthy rich."

Tao laughs. "And here I thought that's the reason you're friends with me. It's good to know I might have other good qualities than my parents' wealth in your eyes."

Sehun turns the key in the ignition and smirks. "Don't flatter yourself. I'm only friends with you because you desperately wanted a dongsaeng in college, and I could get any amount of free food from you any time."

Tao watches as Sehun shifts into a gear, muscles in his forearm shifting.

"You are the worst dongseang I could ever have," he says, in a mournful voice. "I don't know why I missed you."

Sehun looks at him quickly, shifting the gear again and humming appreciatively. "I didn't miss you at all," he says, "but this is definitely better than being picked up in my mother's family van."

Tao shakes his head, watching the smirk playing on Sehun's lips. He wonders if it really can be that easy, falling into old patterns with Sehun. He laughs, remembering how much coaxing, smiling and dish washing it took to persuade Sehun's mom to let him pick Sehun up. It was definitely worth it, seeing Sehun's relieved expression when the wire fence disappeared and watching his mood get better and better as they moved towards the city.

"So how's life?" Sehun asks, an hour later. "When I first saw the car, I thought you finally got that promotion, became the hot shot director or producer and forgot to tell me." He cocks an eyebrow at Tao, and Tao wonders if Sehun will get them plucked again, as he used to in college, or if he'll keep it like this, slightly wild and very _manly_. If this is something that's changed.

"Ah, you know, my boss is still learning to recognize the true talent," he says, as lightly as he can, in reply to Sehun's question. It's quiet after that, only the latest hit song blasting. Tao wonders if that is because he's not telling the whole truth or because they haven't really done this in two years―talking about things that matter.

"Well at least you have a job," Sehun says in the end. He changes lanes and slows down as they near the exit to the part of the city where his parents live. "After that shift of my start date, I keep wondering if there's any waiting for me."

Tao wants to reach out and pat Sehun on the knee, but he remembers that wasn't something Sehun wanted when he had visited. He remembers that half-hug that just happened in front of the base too, so he keeps his hands to himself.

"You talked to Joonmyun-hyung though, right?" he asks instead.

"Uhm," Sehun hums. "He said it's just an HR mess up."

"Then it's going to be fine," Tao says. "In the meantime, I have awesome plans for us." Tao planned on waiting for after Sehun gets to greet his parents, but Sehun's nose is scrunched up and his lips are pressed into a thin line.

Sehun glances at him. "I'm afraid to ask," he says, but Tao hears a hint of excitement in his voice.

"Well, I don't have to tell you," he teases. "Ouch," he shrieks in the next moment, because Sehun's just slapped his thigh, palm open and fingers stinging through the denim.

"If you leave me hanging now, I'll pull off the road and show you what combat techniques they've been teaching me for two years," he says. His face relaxes though, and Tao smirks then pretends to zip his mouth shut.

"Since you are a scary cat, no adventures for you," he says. He's pretty sure Sehun would be on his back, his head in Sehun's chokehold, if he wasn't driving. Instead, Sehun hits him again, and Tao only laughs louder, because this whining and pouting Sehun, loud and obnoxious until he gets what he wants, even if he's not twenty anymore, this is something Tao's familiar with, something he's so glad to have back.

 

Tao manages to stall the announcement until they park in front of Sehun's house. He doesn't plan to walk inside this time because he knows Sehun's mom is waiting for her son and he doesn't want to interrupt the big reunion. He still feels a little guilty about the fact he'll snatch Sehun away so soon, even if she sounded as excited as he felt when he discussed his plan with her. Sehun's mom has always only been too kind to him. Now, Sehun turns to him on his driver's seat and pretends to wrap his fingers around Tao's neck. The tips of them brush against Tao's skin and he feels goosebumps rising in their wake.

"Tell me," Sehun is saying, baring his teeth to look even more menacing.

"Okay, okay." Tao half-heartedly swats Sehun's hands away.

"I figured, since you've found yourself with all this extra free time, and I have this nice new car that needs to be taken out of the city at last, we should do a road trip. A round trip around South Korea, five weeks or so, depending on how annoying you will be. I don't have too big plans, but I've been living in this country for years now, and I've never even been on the other end of it, so we're doing that now." Tao sees Sehun's eyebrows rising, and he quickly adds, "It's all cleared with your parents. Your mom made me pay in heavy labor in your absence, and we're leaving five days from now, the moment I get off work on Friday. You have until then to pack and show off your face and that ugly haircut around. I know at least Jongin is dying to tell you all about his latest manga obsession."

Sehun looks at him, eyes and mouth wide. "You want to spend five weeks driving around Korea. But Korea is tiny."

"Not that tiny," Tao counters, wondering what reaction he has actually expected.

"Says a man from China," Sehun quips, then adds. "With me? In your new car? Just like that? For five weeks?"

Tao nods. "Yes, with you. I'm going to be testing your knowledge of your country. And yes, for five weeks. _At least_. I fully plan to spend several days with my ass parked on some beach."

Sehun is still too quiet and not too happy.

"I mean, we don't have to," Tao backtracks. "I just thought, you know, sand, water, long drives, some grassy hills, lots of open space and no obstacle courses. You could live a little before you coop yourself up with all those numbers or whatever on your new job. I saw those tiny cubicles on Joonmyun's floor." He bites his lip, watching Sehun.

"I want to," Sehun blurts out quickly. "I just." He swallows whatever he wanted to say. "This actually sounds amazing," he says instead. He doesn't look too sure about it though.

Still, Tao heaves a sigh of relief. "Then get out of my car and go spend time with your family. We'll have time to catch up later," he says, pushing still a bit dumbfounded Sehun out of the car. Sehun goes, without a complaint, and they meet by the trunk again, Tao watching uselessly as Sehun throws the duffel across his shoulder and walks towards his house. He drives away when he sees the door opening, realizing how much could have gone wrong then and there and how little he thought about Sehun not being as excited at the prospect of spending a month on the road with just him. Tao himself doesn't think there could be a better way to spend the summer.

 

On Friday, Tao's buzzing with the anticipation as he walks out of the TV station, with a potted fern in one hand and his phone in the other. He switches the camera on as he steps out of the elevator and films the old friendly man at the reception desk waving at him as he walks out. He spins, taking in the tall building and then stopping the recording, already thinking of the soundtrack for the last blurred out frames.

When Sehun walks out of his house an hour and half later, Tao's waiting just out the door. He lowers his small portable camera to give Sehun's mom a hug, and she pats his cheek softly.

"You boys be careful," she says, and Sehun pouts at her.

"Mom, we're grown man. I have combat training. We'll be fine," he says.

"Because you're so menacing," Tao laughs, and Sehun gives him an unimpressed look too.

"Are we going, or are you going to spend the next ten minutes filming my front door, looking for the perfect angle?" he asks, and Tao takes it as a good sign that Sehun seems to now be looking forward to this.

"No, I've done that while I was waiting for you to finally get down here." Tao waves his hand, pointing the camera at Sehun just in time to catch the downturn of his lips, then shuts it off. "Let's go."

It's the same duffel that makes it to the trunk of Tao's car, barely fitting in with everything Tao has packed, and Sehun arches an eyebrow. He doesn't comment about the fern on the back seat though. Tao didn't really think that one through.

"I thought you said to pack lightly."

"Yes," Tao nods. "That was so I could fit all the stuff I'm taking in there," he says, face serious, and Sehun bursts out laughing. Tao is suddenly sorry he's shut the camera off already.

~~0\. go on a road trip~~

The moment Tao starts the car, Sehun starts fiddling with the radio. He's kind of fidgety, but Tao tries to pay attention to the road rather than him, letting Sehun be. The anxiety slowly returns, and it's not a comfortable silence that stretches between them. He squeezes the steering wheel and barely notices when the sound of the radio settles into some trot station. That makes him chuckle a little. Sehun would. But then Sehun is laughing, and Tao glances at him.

"You actually bought a South Korea travel guide," he says, clutching the book Tao has almost forgotten at home that morning and had to run up to his apartment to take. And it's full of bookmarks; you can't be serious." Sehun's expression has turned into one of wonder when Tao looks again, as they take an exit to the highway. "You said you didn't plan _too_ much."

"I didn't," Tao says, a little defensive at Sehun's mocking tone. So what if he spent the past month sifting through things he wanted to do. "They're all just suggestions," he says.

Sehun goes quiet, looking through the bookmarks, and sighs only another ten minutes later.

"I'm ..." he starts to say, then pushes his lips together.

Tao bites his lip and dares to pinch Sehun's thigh. "Spill," he orders. Sehun yelps, glares a little, and slaps Tao's thigh in return.

"I'm glad we're doing this," he says in the end. "It was ... a little overwhelming. Coming back, I mean. I woke up too soon every morning, but mom was already up and fuzzing. And meeting everyone, listening to what they're busy with, how much life has just changed, not even in the past two years, but just since my last vacation, since the last e-mail. I don't know, just ..." Sehun trails off again.

Tao hums. "Nothing much has changed with me," he says. He tries not to sound bitter about it. If Sehun notices, he doesn't say anything.

"Clearly, you still love me enough to take me on an awesome road trip," Sehun chirps, tossing the guide book to the back, and barely missing the fern. "But then it wouldn't be half that awesome without me," he adds, and grins.

Tao's shoulders sag in relief. "Whatever you say, Sehunnie."

"So where are we headed?" Sehun suddenly asks, looking around them on the road. The sun has set already, but the sky is still painted faint pink with it.

"I don't know," Tao lies. "Maybe to get some chicken for dinner."

Sehun notices a sign for Chuncheon then and grins, sinking deeper into the passenger seat.

"Chicken sounds great."

 

"There is something as too much chicken after all," Sehun slurs, hours later, as they stumble down the street, both of them more than a little drunk and too full.

"It is, when you eat through your body weight in it," Tao says, his hands gripping Sehun's hip. He needs to keep the other up, and Sehun didn't mind, this time, when Tao wrapped an arm around his waist.

"I have to text Jongin this," Sehun says, tripping and almost bringing them both down. Tao sits them both on a road curb and watches as Sehun types what is probably an incomprehensible KakaoTalk message to Jongin. When done, Sehun sighs contently, resting his head on Tao's shoulder. It's too warm, even at night, and their car isn't too far away, so Tao lets him be, tipping his head up. There's too many lights around them to see stars now, but it feels nice anyway. He giggles when he hears Sehun snore a little, but he nudges him and crouches in front of him. And it's just like college times, Sehun's arms automatically coming up to wrap around Tao's neck, chest pressing into his back.

"What's your secret?" Sehun asks, as Tao manages to get up and grab Sehun's knees to haul him higher on his back. "I know for a fact I'm a stronger drinker than you are, but you always end up being the sober one. You've always given me piggy back rides in college too."

"That's because I might be a light weight, but you are the lighter one of us. We'd never get back to the dorms if we relied on your drinking skills only."

"Cheater," Sehun sighs against his ear. Tao just laughs, feeling pleasantly warm and deciding to stroll around the area for a little longer before they collapse at the back seats of his car for a while.

 

Tao sips on his cup of coffee, not really reading his book anymore. He's watching Sehun instead, stirring at the back of the car across the street from him. He was about to get worried because the sun is high up already. Even if he left the car windows all open, it must be getting pretty stuffy in there. He doesn't want to fry Sehun less than a day out of Seoul. Sehun stumbles out a minute later, eyebrows furrowed as he snatches the post it from between his eyes. He looks up from it and right at Tao, and Tao grins and waves. Sehun stretches his arms, unfazed, the crumpled t-shirt from yesterday rising with the motion, and it's Tao who arches an eyebrow. He gets up, paying for his coffee and getting another cup of cold americano for Sehun, while Sehun waits, leaning against the side doors.

"My back is broken," he announces.

"Wimp," Tao replies, handing him the coffee.

"I need to wash up," Sehun adds, and Tao notices Sehun's sizing him up.

"I just rubbed my eyes and put a gum in my mouth," he informs Sehun after a moment.

"That's so gross."

"Let's find some gas station. We can wash our teeth in the bathroom there, and get some breakfast."

"What did I get myself into?" Sehun asks.

Tao just shrugs and gets into the car. "The old lady who owns the coffee shop almost called police on us for sleeping in the car. Next time we need to stay out of the residential area."

Sehun pokes at his cheek in the mirror on the back of the sun shield and hums. Tao only shakes his head.

"By the way, since when do you read actual books?" Sehun asks, when Tao pulls off the curb.

"Jongin thinks I need to broaden my horizons," Tao mumbles. Sehun takes his phone out and tells Tao to wave into the camera, then spins around, aiming at something at the back seat.

"I think we killed the fern."

20\. read a book

By the river, they plant the fern. Sehun laughs like an idiot the entire time he digs into the dirt with his hands and complains about Tao not helping. Tao films the entire process on his camera, and only later realizes there's more of Sehun's face than fern planting in that footage. By then, the water skiing instructor is free, and Tao is the one being filmed in the water. Sehun is lounging at the back of the boat, camera in hand, and he watches as Tao fails to stay up on the skis and above water for more than a minute. He's tried wake boarding before, but apparently two separate skis above water is just not his thing. Nor is it Sehun's, they find out when they switch, but it does take him one less try to get up and ride for three minutes straight. He brags about it for way too long, chattering away as they lie out on the deck, only in their shorts.

"So," Sehun starts, after a moment of silence. "Did Jongin recommend you a book about how to set up a successful business?"

Tao looks to the side at him, and Sehun's face is blank, but Tao sees him swallowing carefully.

"Nah, that was the first thing I found on Joonmyun's book shelf," he answers. Sehun turns his head to look straight at him.

"Well, I guess better than one of his meditation books," he says at last, and Tao grins at him, feeling the relief washing over him because Sehun doesn't push it. In gratitude, he nudges Sehun's side. Last night seem to have broken some of the barriers because Tao's not afraid anymore to reach over even if Sehun isn't drunk, and he knows Sehun won't flinch. They spend another hour with their legs dangling off the deck before they move again.

 ~~7\. go water skiing~~  
  
"I can't believe it took us like two days to get to the sea," Sehun comments, when they stop at one of the rest stops, hours later. Sun has already set, and soon it will be completely dark, but they can see the ocean.

There's no one but them here, and Tao's left the radio in his car on. There's some old Korean song playing, and Sehun's tapping his foot to it.

"Did your music taste change too?" Tao blurts out, and Sehun looks at him, surprised.

"Too?"

A boat light on the water wavers in front of them.

"What else changed?" Sehun asks, and Tao sighs, moving to stand in front of him and blocking Sehun's view of the water.

"This," he says, poking Sehun's arms. "And this," he continues, lightly running a finger over Sehun's jaw. Sehun jerks a little, and Tao can't control it, he knows he's not looking at Sehun too happily right now. "That too, that reaction," he says, then quickly adds, "And your eyebrows are a mess." He laughs, hoping to dissolve the weird atmosphere, but it's still there, even when Sehun rests his palms on Tao's shoulders. In the past, Tao wouldn't spare one thought to a gesture like that, to the quick squeeze of Sehun's fingers, but now ...

"For the record, I've always liked all kinds of music. And I just thought it'd be fun to have some soundtrack to this road trip of ours." He quiets for a moment before he continues. Tao lets him collect his thoughts, remembering how Sehun used to need a minute sometimes to push and pull around his brain before he was sure about what he'd say next. "And I've grown, just like my eyebrows, so my habits changed a little, but like. Didn't you change too? Nothing has ever stopped you from being a touchy emotional mess."

"Hey," Tao protest. "I'm never a mess," he adds, but he thinks he gets it. He barrels into Sehun and gives him the proper welcome hug that is about a week overdue. He probably squeezes too tight because Sehun starts tickling him, and Tao ends up shrieking and running for cover. In the end, he locks Sehun out of the car until the other begs to be let in. Tao makes him promise to behave on camera, for evidence in court of justice, before letting him in.

 

When they pull out of the rest stop, Sehun scrolls through his music player until he finds another playlist.

"You know, I didn't really mind that old one. I think it's cute you went and downloaded a summer playlist for the road," he says.

"Shut up. It's not cute. It's thoughtful," Sehun says, and then turns the volume way too up. It's a rockish song now, in English, and all Tao gets from it is _ride_ and _best friend_. He pulls down all the windows anyway and lets Sehun pretend he's some punk as he bobs his head and wades through the outside air with fingers of his right hand.

~~5\. find the[song of the summer ](http://vimeo.com/25370939)~~

They only find a guest house to stay in the next day. They book three nights in it because Tao has meant it about planning on spending a few days just lazing on the beach. He hasn't had a proper vacation since he started working full time. He likes that Sehun doesn't even make that much fun of him when he just flops into the sand after they check-in late in the afternoon and stays there until dinner time. The guest house is small and so is their room, and it's Sehun who makes the decision to push their two small single beds together. When he lies down, freshly showered and eyes already drooping, his feet stick out, the bed too short.

"This reminds me of Chanyeol-hyung," he sighs. "I really need to call him."

Tao sits down on the edge, going through the videos from the day and posting one on his meipai. It's cute and silly, Sehun, stuck with his feet up to the ankles in wet sand in shallow water, limbs flailing,

"We should send him a postcard, as a bit of a late thanks and a proof of his good deeds," he says, distractedly.

Sehun laughs into his pillow. "What good deeds?" he asks, trying to sound skeptical.

"Well, if we both didn't try to hit on him when he was a TA for that freshmen math course, you might have never realized how cool I am. We could have stayed only distant acquaintances."

"I also wouldn't have to spend money on Minseok-hyung's lunches for a month in order to prevent that video of us making out to get Chanyeol's attention from being posted on my year's facebook page."

At the time, it sounded like a good idea, since Chanyeol absolutely failed to notice how hot they were and that they were hitting on him. One too many times, Sehun and Tao ended up drinking together and watching Chanyeol in sorrow from the distance. Tao thinks that even back then Chanyeol might have only looked at Jongin, sleepy eyed an awkward and alluring. Only their plan kind of backfired, because for months after that make-out incident, Chanyeol thought they were dating. By the time they persuaded him they weren't in fact _cute high school sweethearts_ ―damn it they didn't even go to the same high school or knew each other then―they've all ended up being friends, and neither Sehun nor Tao were interested in Chanyeol anymore.

"Look at it this way. At least we found soon enough that Minseok-hyung isn't just an innocent face."

Sehun laughs again, quieter now, a little lost in his thoughts, and by the time Tao drops his phone to properly look at him, Sehun's asleep.

 

Tao wakes Sehun up to see sunrise every day because this guest house is right on a tiny beach, and it takes just minutes to stumble out of the bed and onto the terrace down the stairs. By the third day, Sehun doesn't even complain about it, instead walks down to the edge of the water and watches from there. Tao films the sunrise, and Sehun tells him he's stupid because it's like he's missing it. And Tao does miss it, kind of, after that, because Sehun's profile in the early morning light, soft and swelling, is beautiful.

During the days, they eat too much ice cream that the guest house owners make and Tao starts building a sand castle. Sehun joins in, when it somehow survives the first night. They compete in who builds a better fortification on his side, elbowing each other as they dig out a water moat around it together. By the last day, it's an impressive fortress, and Sehun pronounces it indestructible.

An hour later, a family of four arrives to check into the guest house, and Sehun and Tao watch an attack of three year old twins on their masterpiece. It ends in total collapse of all protections, the inner walls crumbling under the childish excitement.

"You totally jinxed it," Tao says, dryly. He managed to catch the end of _the Seizure of Sand Castle_ on his camera. Sehun looks almost dejected, but then one of the twin boys turns towards them, covered in sand and laughing loudly, and Sehun's face lights up.

"That looked like fun. Next time, you build it and I'll destroy it."

 ~~15\. watch a sunrise on a beach~~ III

~~1\. build a sand castle~~

Before they leave, Tao grabs a notebook and the empty bottle from the soju they shared last night before sleep. Sehun watches him as he scribbles something on the paper and starts rolling it up.

"Oh, me too," he says, realizing what Tao's doing, and he pulls the notebook from him. Tao really likes it when Sehun just goes along with things, not mocking or questioning Tao wanting to send messages in bottles out to the sea. He films as Sehun wades into the deep water and throws the bottle as far as he can, curious about what Sehun's written. He'd been so secretive about it, but for all Tao knows, he might have just scribbled a date down and he's teasing. Sehun spins around and gives him thumbs up, and Tao returns it. He turns the camera off and only then realizes it was technically Sehun, not him, who sent the messages in the end.

It's Sehun who's stuffing their bags into the car trunk. It takes him a long time, and he keeps huffing at the mess in it. When he comes to sit on the passenger seat, his face is red and his forehead sweaty.

"You have too much junk back there," he complains.

"Only the things we might need."

"And for what exactly will we need a hammock?" Sehun asks, incredulously. "Because you totally have a hammock net back there."

Tao shrugs his shoulders. "You never know when you'll feel like sleeping in one," he says. Sehun drops it, and once again Tao is grateful for how easy it is for Sehun to go with Tao's moods and ideas.

~~11\. send a message in a bottle~~

"You can't chicken out now," Sehun says, clutching to Tao's hips.

"I'm not going to. I just ... need a moment?" Tao whispers, pulling on the harness around Sehun's middle. "Is this really safe?" he asks, turning to the instructor who is watching them, amused, already holding onto the long cord.

"It was you who were all, 'Look there's a bungee jumping center close by, let's go, never mind lunch, forget buying some food, we're going right away,' and now you're stressing me out. It's safe, they say it's safe. You told me it was safe, Tao, so don't you dare back out on me now, when I'm all strapped up and reconciled with the fact that we can break our skulls if we bump them together."

The instructor clears his throat, and Tao grips both of Sehun's hands in his own.

"Okay, okay, I get it."

"Like, one minute you're running from one convenience store to another looking for root beer, and in the next one we're on top of a bungee jumping tower. Take responsibility, damn it," Sehun finishes his rant, and only then realizes their hands are clasped and the instructor is laughing at them a bit. He looks down to where Tao's fingers are twined around his and Tao slips one of his hands free, wraps it around Sehun's waist.

"I know. I really wanted to try. Thank you for doing this with me."

"What do you need the root beer for?" Sehun asks.

And Tao is laughing, and all his apprehension is gone. "I'm having weird cravings lately," he says seriously, and Sehun huffs. The nervousness seeps out of his shoulders as well, and he taps his thumb over Tao's.

"You're stupid."

"You ready now?" The instructor asks, and they turn to him. "Don't forget what I told you. You both need to jump. I'll toss the cord after you."

"Don't forget to film it," Tao reminds him, and Sehun rolls his eyes.

"Or you can toss the camera after us too, for a better angle," he says. Tao wants to swat Sehun over his head for it, but his hands are full of said Sehun, and he'd rather not let go, and definitely not right now.

"Okay then, on the count of three?" the instructor tries again, and they nod in unison, moving closer to the edge.

"Don't look," Sehun says.

"Okay." They're looking right at each other as the number three is shouted and they manage to jump, completely in sync. Tao screams more, and soon Sehun is more laughing, loud and obnoxious, as they fly through the air. Tao's lightheaded, the trees and the water underneath them swimming on the edges of his vision, nose full of Sehun's hair. They jerk at the bottom, but manage to not split any heads. Tao's heart is beating too fast, and Sehun's saying something, but Tao isn't sure what. Sehun ducks his head under Tao's chin on the next drop, and Tao only clutches to his back, bringing him closer and letting too many sensations soar through him just like he's soaring through air right now.

Sehun's still laughing when they lower them down, people helping to untangle them.

"Thank you," he says, as they stumble apart. Tao's legs are shaking, and he collapses on the bench. He has a lapful of Sehun the next moment, Sehun patting down his hair and repeating his thank yous and how awesome it was. Tao only holds on, as tight as he did high up in the air.

~~30\. go bungee jumping~~

"Don't pretend you aren't amused," Tao says, as Sehun gives him a judging look.

"Out of all the things you have bookmarked in that travel guide, this penis park is the one you really couldn't miss out on."

"Say cheese," Tao says instead of a reply, and takes a picture of angry Sehun and the first of many huge penises in the background.

Three hours later, Tao has taken at least thirty pictures, which are collecting crude comments on his Instagram, and several videos, which lead to Sehun confiscating his phone and camera. They're enjoying walking around and the scenery below them now, more than the never ending statues of big penises, men with big penises, and big penises pretending to be something else, but still.

"I'll help you look for a root beer, if we leave now," Sehun says, and Tao laughs.

"Is the competition in this place making you uncomfortable?" he asks, and Sehun punches him.

"For that, I'm keeping your phone until tomorrow night," he says. Well, Tao figures out, Sehun is doing him a favor.

3\. make root beer floats

~~35\. go a day without the internet~~

Tao shakes his head when he gets out of the third guest house that evening. It's late now, completely dark. With the summer in full swing and weekend approaching, it's been hard finding places to sleep last minute. Tao has a tent in the back that he hasn't pulled out yet because it's been easier to sleep in the car than looking for camping sites.

"I've been kind of hoping for a shower and a bed tonight," Sehun says. He wrinkles his nose as he smells his skin, salty from the morning swim they went for.

"Actually, I have a plan," Tao wiggles his eyebrows.

"The lady at the reception mentioned there's a big bonfire on the beach in the town. I want to go, so we could do that and then stay in a bath house. I bet we can find one that is open nonstop."

Sehun appears tired for a moment, but then he looks at Tao, bites his lips and straightens his shoulders.

"Can we get marshmallows?" he asks. "They should be easier to find than root beer."

 

Sehun burns his tongue on a too-hot marshmallow or five. He keeps hissing and sticking his tongue out of his mouth "to cool it down." Tao tries valiantly not to laugh at him. He only really stops when he catches himself thinking about how it would feel to trap Sehun's tongue between his lips, to try to soothe it with his own. Sehun gives him a strange look when he goes quiet, and Tao pulls out his phone and makes them take a selca. He's filmed the lively bonfire festivities already. Now the atmosphere shifts into a more serene one, as the crowd thins out and someone starts playing guitar. People start to sing, and Sehun moves to sit closer to Tao in the sand, head on his shoulder again.

Later in the bath house, Sehun is half asleep as they strip down and get into the showers. Tao washes his hair and then Sehun's too, and Sehun hums contently, lets himself be led around like a lost puppy. Tao finds them a quiet corner and lets Sehun sprawl on the floor. He goes and gets them shaved ice.

"For your tongue," he says, when he comes back. Sehun barely manages to open his eyes. "Sorry, Hun-ah. Didn't want to wake you," Tao murmurs.

Sehun shakes his head, sitting up cross legged. "Thanks, hyung," he murmurs.

Tao drops next to him, and rubs his thigh. "Now I'm your hyung, huh?" he teases.

"You're taking care of me. Just roll with it," Sehun mumbles, tongue heavy with sleep and frozen from the ice. Tao massages his neck, watching him eat. He collects the empty paper cups when Sehun is done and leaves again to throw them away. When he returns, Sehun's lying down, breathing evenly, but he turns to his side and throws his thigh over Tao's legs the moment Tao drops to the floor. Tao drags the leg higher so Sehun can get comfortable. He rubs circles around the cap of Sehun's knee until he falls asleep. It takes longer with his hand busy with the feel of Sehun's warm skin under his fingertips.  
  
~~13\. attend/make a bonfire and roast marshmallows~~

Sehun has been eyeing him suspiciously all day long, but didn't protest when Tao rented a tandem bike. They spend the day on it, bickering about who sits in front and who sits at the back. When Tao goes to return it, he leaves Sehun with the car keys. He makes a quick stop for some snacks on his way back. His stomach drops a little when he comes back and sees Sehun sitting in the driver's seat, legs out of the open door, sun shield of the driver's seat dropped down, and a sheet of paper in Sehun's hands.

"You have a bucket list?" he asks, when Tao approaches. "That's why you're so frantic about the root beer? That's why you have the hammock!" The last part isn't even a question anymore as Sehun skims through the list. He snorts, running a finger across something, then looks up at Tao.

"It's not a bucket list," is what Tao decides to say. "I mean. I'm not planning to die anytime soon, so it's not a bucket list."

"Okay?" Sehun says. "Then you have an extensive list of things you want to do in the next five weeks which includes things such as make floaties from root beer, start a fire without matches and," Sehun skims down further, "fall in love?"

Tao didn't really have a reason to hide the list from Sehun in the first place. He just put together like four different ones, deleted stuff like _shout something silly from the top of Eiffel tower_ and kept it. So that's what he tells Sehun now.

"I just wanted some fun ideas I wouldn't want to miss doing this summer. The love one was probably on every list I used, and I guess I missed one when editing it?"

Sehun is already pulling a pen out.

"I think it's time to give up on the root beer thing," he says. Tao sees him scratching at something. So instead, make it 'eat as many types of shaved ice as possible.' I bet we can find some really messed up ones."

Tao just nods, forcing himself to breath through his panic attack. He doesn't know why he's even having one.

"But if you leave me to die in some small village when you find the love of your life, Tao, I swear I'll come back to Seoul to haunt you." Sehun raises an eyebrow at Tao, tugging the list back into the small pouch on the back of the sun shield. "Now, let's find some waterfall to jump from."

~~40\. ride a tandem bicycle~~

"You're a menace," Tao says, struggling to untangle the hammock net pooling at his feet. "You hijack my car, drive us into some mountain range, almost kill me on a raft because that _cascade looked fun_ , you make me climb not one, but two trees because you feel the first one didn't do the task justice, and now there are bugs everywhere, and you're not even helping."

"I sound so cool. Aren't you glad we're friends?" Sehun says smugly, leaning against a tree. "Plus, I did help. I found us a camping site and a perfect place for a hammock. All you need to do is put it up."

"There are bugs everywhere," Tao repeats, kicking the net that would not untangle. Sehun laughs and digs through Tao's big backpack.

"Here, take your weapon," he says, handing Tao the electric bug frying racket, as he called it earlier when Tao brandished it for the first time. Sehun almost choked on his laughter when he saw Tao wield it like a sword.

Tao does take it though, slashing it through the air. Sehun chuckles but snatches the hammock and has it untangled within a minute.

"How," Tao murmurs, and Sehun just shrugs. Tao grabs his camera.

"You are unbelievable," Sehun comments, pretending to be put off, and Tao zooms in on his mouth as it turns down again, just to get back at him.

Sehun ties one end of the net and then picks up a dried up piece of wood, throwing it at Tao. "Drop the camera and help me," he says, and Tao does pocket it and helps Sehun stretch the hammock between two trees and tie it up in secure knots.

"Looks awesome," Tao comments, slinging an arm over Sehun's shoulders. "Good job."

Sehun snorts. "Someone has to do it. You'd be totally useless without me."

Tao curls his fingers around Sehun's shoulder, squeezing and pulling him closer. He swallows whatever truth that's bubbling in his throat. "You just keep telling yourself that."

~~22\. go river rafting~~

~~47\. climb a tree~~ II

Their travel pillows and light blankets find their way into the hammock after dinner, and Tao's not even surprised that Sehun climbs in after him too. They set up a tent earlier, but Tao's more than content like this. He tries to get them both comfortable, rocking the hammock in the process and making Sehun giggle. Their legs are tangled in the net, and Sehun's using Tao more than his pillow to rest his head on.

It's nice to have Sehun this close again. It was when they were like this, lounging on one narrow bed in Tao's dorm room, watching some action movies, that Tao used to tell all his secrets to Sehun, talk to him about all his worries and share all the fun stuff. Sehun would giggle and laugh just like this or rub at Tao's hip and make him relax, and then he'd share just as much with Tao as well. So many things are on the tip of Tao's tongue now. What comes out though is,

"Is that rain?"

Sehun stills, and they listen for just a moment. The whispering hum of leaves above them turns to loud rustle, and soon enough a raindrop hits Tao's nose. Another one drops to his cheek right after, and the sound of the rustling around them gets stronger.

"Ah," Sehun says, sounding bumped. "That kind of spoils my efforts." He doesn't move off Tao though, and the hammock is still swinging lightly.

"Well, next time, I'll build the hammock," Tao says to pacify him.

"Oh," Sehun cranes his neck to look at Tao. "I didn't mean that. I kind of like your list. So since you took me on an awesome road trip, I'll make sure to clear that list of yours. Well, this is a minor set back."

"I'm sorry?" Tao says, amused. "So are we moving inside the tent?"

"Nah," Sehun still isn't moving much. "I'm kind of comfortable, and it was a stuffy day. Getting rained on doesn't sound so bad right now."

Tao's hair is starting to stick to his forehead, and for a moment he's envious of how Sehun doesn't have that problem. Then he notices a drop of water sliding down Sehun's cheek and how Sehun's so close he can see the scar on it perfectly. Tao blinks and finds himself being kissed, Sehun's eyes closed, noses bumping, Sehun's soft lips brushing Tao's broken ones. It's only a peck at first, and Sehun makes this thoughtful noise in the back of his throat as he pulls back. All this while, Tao stays frozen in place. Sehun pushes himself up a little, making the hammock swing more violently, and leans down again.

Tao reaches for Sehun's arm, and Sehun nips on his lower lip. Tao manages to finally, finally close his eyes, and he's only now gasping from shock. Sehun nudges him, nose purposefully bumping against Tao's, and then Tao feels his tongue running across the underside of his lip. Sehun's hand comes up to cup Tao's cheek, and Tao pushes his tongue into Sehun's mouth. His heart is thudding too fast, and the rain and their breathing are too loud in his ears, but he just kisses Sehun, over and over again, until Sehun laughs into the kiss. He pulls away and kisses the corner of Tao's lip for the last time.

"Well, I guess it didn't rain on my parade that much after all," he says, and grins. "Now that you've got your kiss in the rain, let's sleep in the tent. Might as well, since we managed to make it stay up."

Tao's knees are weak, and it takes him a while to realize that Sehun kissed him because it was on the list. He shakily gets out of the hammock and trudges behind Sehun, who is already chattering about how the tents they used in the army weren't really waterproof, at least not if you were just serving your mandatory time. Their small tent feels like luxury mansion to him compared.

24\. sleep in a hammock

~~8\. kiss in the rain~~

Sehun googles how to make a suntan tattoo happen when Tao drives them from the inland back to the coastline. There are places he doesn't actually want to skip, despite still being adamant about not having anything planned. Tao draws a crown just above the waistband of Sehun's shorts. Sehun's biting his lip and trying not to squirm the entire time, while Tao comes back with more and more of sunscreen, nail scratching the skin on purpose. He watches Sehun's face, eyes squinting against the sun, lips slick and bitten, and he wishes he had his camera on him. Sehun doesn't let him see what he's drawn on Tao's lower belly in turn, pulling Tao's waistband a little lower to complete his secret work of art. For hours, they do absolutely nothing but reapply the sunscreen on each other, eat snacks from Sehun's bag and drink too warm soda.

"This is hard work," Sehun says as the sun sets somewhere behind them.

"I think I'm dehydrated," Tao answers.

"Oh god, I'm so glad no one sees the abyss of laziness we have fallen into."

"I object. This is how a vacation should look like," Tao says. "You remember it when you sit at your desk all through the next summer."

"You sound so bitter about my future," Sehun notes. "You know I actually like working in audit, right? I remember flailing to you about my summer internship there."

"I guess I'm just not so excited about," Tao stops, thinking what it is he's not so excited about. "About you becoming a responsible working adult with no time for road trips?" he says at last because he can't come up with any better way to put it.

"It's not like we can't take short ones over weekends," Sehun points out.

"I," Tao tries again. "I missed you a lot. When you were in the army. And―"

Sehun sits up, grabbing a discarded shirt and wiping Tao's lower stomach. "Well, that's over now," he says resolutely.

Tao thinks about how he barely even sees Joonmyun. How Joonmyun's getting married at the end of the summer, and Minseok's wife is pregnant, and how far away it sometimes feels, the distance between two office buildings in the business district of Seoul.

"And look, now you even have my name on you to remind you who's your best friend. Maybe I should have put my number on you too, so you know who to call when your boss is being stupid."

Tao makes a face, and Sehun mimics him. That's when Tao catches on to what Sehun's said. When he looks down his body, he sees Sehun's name in sloppy finger thick lines on his stomach.

He opens his mouth to say something, but Sehun just leans down and kisses Tao. It catches Tao off guard just like the first time, but he recovers quicker. Sehun sighs into his mouth when Tao kisses back and collapses on top of him. It's ... It's like he's relieved, but Tao's too busy trying to deal with Sehun, with his thigh wedged between Tao's own, kissing down his jaw, to analyze that.

"Sehunnie," he says, looking around frantically, but the beach has emptied out, and it's almost dark now.

"You like the tattoo," Sehun murmurs into his neck, smug. So Tao pulls him up into another kiss, hands moving to grip at Sehun's ass. They can't do much more here, but Sehun's mewling into the kiss and grinding into him a little, and there's entirely too much bare skin between them. When Sehun pulls away for good, minutes later, Tao's breathing is too erratic and he has no clue what he's doing anymore.

Sehun sprawls on his back again, scooting closer so that their hips bump into each other. He takes a picture with Tao's phone, of the two of them and their tattoos, Tao thinks.

"I'm a man on a mission," he says, pumping his fist.

"That picture will suck; all the wrong angles," Tao says weakly.

"That's a matter of opinion," Sehun replies, then wiggles. "I have sand everywhere."

~~28\. get a suntan tattoo~~

~~21\. make out on the beach~~

Sehun is skipping next to him like a little kid, pushing Tao to walk faster.

"I haven't seen a movie in a movie theater for two years. I can't believe it's been that long," he says, turning around to face Tao and walking backwards.

"I can't believe I let that happen," Tao says, his voice grave.

"You sound like you're personally responsible for my cultural activities," Sehun notes.

Tao shrugs. He's always dragged Sehun to all the weird plays and movies he's been interested in. "True. I better not be held responsible for making you watch too-old Disney movies."

"Disney movies never get too old," Sehun says, " _You_ told me so."

Tao nods at that and pulls out his camera. "I haven't watched a movie outside in a long time," he says. Sehun waves into the camera before Tao pans away from him and to the building. He's plenty excited himself, but Sehun's enthusiasm is contagious. Tao's almost jittery with it, and his hand shakes a little.

"Stop it already," Sehun appears too close to his camera. He pulls at Tao's elbow until Tao puts the camera away, then grabs his hand properly and keeps pulling. They practically run to the entrance. Sehun doesn't let go of Tao's hand, not until he has to pull out his wallet to pay for their popcorn and soda.

"My treat today," he says, and dumps the popcorn on Tao. Tao nods dumbly and tries to focus on getting them to their seats instead of on Sehun's relaxed, happy expression as he pulls on Tao's elbow yet again.

~~26\. see a movie outdoors~~

When the movie is over, Sehun is buzzing with too much energy to go back to their hotel, and Busan's too alluring, with its loud lights and people milling about. They haven't gotten properly drunk since the first night on the road, but they're planning to stay in the city tomorrow morning, so they end up drinking one too many beers. Or Sehun does because after the third one, Tao starts ordering the nonalcoholic version behind Sehun's back, as he always does. Sehun never notices, and it makes Tao chuckle when once again he complains about Tao being much more sober than he should be as they're kicked out of the closing bar.

Sehun's arm is warm around Tao's shoulders when they stumble down the street.

"You always take care of me," Sehun says, and leans into Tao happily. "It's not fair. You let me do that too. To be better."

Tao smiles, thinking of all the times he found Sehun to be too good to him.

"I'm serious," Sehun grumbles. "Stop smiling mysteriously." He pokes Tao in the ribs with his free hand, and Tao grabs his wrist to stop him, spinning them to face each other. Sehun licks his lips, and Tao thinks Sehun's going to kiss him, and that this time he might be ready. Instead, Sehun suddenly yells out something incomprehensible and starts dragging Tao across the road he's been facing. He almost trips, and Tao steadies him with a hand on the small of his back.

"Swings," Sehun says then, and he pushes Tao towards them. "Yes!"

Tao finds himself seated on a seat too small for him, holding onto the ropes as Sehun pushes onto his back.

"So what's the thrill like?" he asks, pressing heavily into Tao's back. The swing slopes creak dangerously.

"Other than the fear of the swing collapsing?" Tao asks.

Sehun pushes even stronger. "Are you implying your summer list includes stupid, pointless things?" he asks, trying to sound serious, but still slurring his words a little.

Tao only now realizes that this is one of the things on it. "Did you learn that thing by heart?" he asks, digging his heels into the dirt and spinning the swing ropes so that he faces Sehun. He uses his feet to control how close he comes to Sehun, who immediately takes hold of the ropes on either side of Tao's head and leans forward, hanging his weight off the swing as well.

"Maybe," he says. He's smirking a little, and Tao really wants to kiss him, but kissing on the swing isn't on the list and they don't really ever talk about Sehun reaching over and kissing Tao, even if they've made out on the beach every night since the first time, leaving Tao confused and frustrated, but also too drawn in and not wanting to protest.

"I think this particular task needs to be spiced up a little to make it count though," Sehun says. It's not the first time Tao's wondered if he can read Tao's mind. Maybe it's just his face that always gives Tao away.

Sehun's kiss is chaste and tastes like beer. It's still a rush and a surge of feelings that Tao's not prepared for. Sehun keeps their foreheads pressed together for a while after.

"I'm tired," he mumbles in the end.

"I'll piggy back you to the hotel," Tao replies. Sehun's already spinning the swing back in place so he can climb up.

 ~~42\. swing on a kids swing~~ \+ ~~_kiss on it_~~

"You boys are sure you want to ride a boat right now?" The sinewy fisherman they find in the port asks them.

Sehun's pretty green in the face, and Tao still doesn't understand how he's gotten up before sunrise and dragged Tao down here after the amount of beer he drunk last night.

"It's the training," Sehun only muttered, cradling his water bottle in his lap as Tao got dressed.

"We'll be fine, sir," Tao says, and flashes the man a smile. "If it's not too much trouble, we'd really like to go with you." He picks up the buckets from the deck, lifting them for the man to take onto his deck. "Let us help."

The man smiles back at him, and Tao knows he's just charmed his pants off. Sehun knows it too, and he huffs in amusement.

"You're too good at this," he whispers when the fisherman isn't looking.

"Well, one of us has to have some people skills," Tao retorts, handing the fishing cords over to their new friend, Young-chul.

To his credit, Sehun doesn't throw up, not even when the boat rocks dangerously as they slide out of the closed off bay and into the more open waters. He grips the side of the boat and lets Tao do all the fishing and exciting shouting. He's the one that takes videos this time, filming Tao pulling out the biggest fish of the day, and Young-chul gutting one of the smaller ones that he claims is the tastiest, quickly slicing the meat and offering it with soy sauce. When they get back, Sehun smells like the ocean, but so does Tao, and there's much more color in Sehun's cheeks.

It's still soon, and they hang around, helping Young-chul sell his catch to the locals coming to the port for fresh fish. Sehun is an instant hit with the old ladies, and they coo over him. Tao tries flirting with them to catch up in the fish sale competition Young-chul somehow instigated, but he loses. Sehun sticks his tongue out, and Tao can't bring himself to be mad at all.

"You stink," he tells Sehun. Sehun leans over, sniffing behind Tao's ear and making a face.

"Can't be worse than you though," he says, absolutely ignorant to the goosebumps he leaves behind on Tao's neck.

~~27\. catch a fish~~

They shower before checking out of their hotel, and Tao's ready to head out, maybe find another beach to spend the rest of the day napping on, when Sehun pulls him in the opposite direction of their car.

"I want to do one more thing while we're here," he says, and before Tao can ask anything, they're entering a hair saloon.

"I want to get my hair dyed," Sehun says to the girl at the desk. "Is anyone free now?"

There is. An hour later, Sehun's hair is white blond, and his undersides are shaven off completely. He looks much younger like this, and Tao runs his fingers over the hair. It's grown, even if just a little, but with the sides shaved off to practically nothing, it's more visible now.

"Whoa," he gets to say, before Sehun's pushing him into the chair as well.

"Hey," Tao protests, and the young girl who's done Sehun's hair grins conspiratorially at Sehun through the mirror. "Traitor," Tao grumbles.

Tao's hair is soon dark blue, and Sehun laughs loudly as he adds _dye your hair some crazy color_ onto the list. When he's done, he runs both of his hands through Tao's hair, messing the styling of it, takes a bunch of pictures of Tao alone, and then poses with him.

"I'm sending this to all our friends," he proclaims happily.

"Don't you dare!" Tao tries to snatch Sehun's phone away, but Sehun runs. Tao has to chase him, and Sehun only stops when they're back by the car.

"Stop pouting. It's perfect," he says sincerely, when Tao finally catches up to him. He looks down, tongue peeking out in concentration as he types, and Tao knows the picture's going up on his Instagram and it's being sent to every single one of their friends, but he's frozen, just watching, heart pounding. Sehun looks up from his phone, a little confused by the sudden silence.

"What's up?" he asks, tilting his head a little.

Tao's in love. Tao's been in love for a long time, probably, but this moment, so unsubstantial, Sehun quirking his eyebrow and still smirking a little in accomplishment, is the one that makes Tao realize. His heart drops to his stomach and his throat goes dry.

"Nothing," he croaks. "Do you want to drive?"

Sehun swipes the keys up, and Tao walks towards the passenger seat. When Sehun starts the car, one of his playlists starts out right away. It's some love song, and Tao clutches the door handle, taking careful breaths and letting the city blur behind the car window.

\+ ~~_dye your hair some crazy color_~~

50\. fall in love

It's too late to take a ferry to Oedo when Sehun and Tao arrive. They find a guest house for that night nearby, have a quick dinner, and walk to the pebble beach that's conveniently close. Sehun makes them walk barefoot over the stones, claiming it's good for their feet, and they try to make the flattest pebbles skip on the water surface as many times as possible in the fading light. Sehun pushes Tao into the water when he wins three times in a row and laughs while Tao trudges out and tries to squeeze as much water out of his pants as possible.

It's a warm night, but the fabric sticks to his thighs uncomfortably, and he scrunches his nose and curses at Sehun. "You're such a sore loser," he adds.

"Oh, shut up and sit down," Sehun says, plopping down a safe distance away from the water.

Tao obeys, and Sehun shares a bag of dried seaweed with him.

"Don't you think some snack can fix this," Tao says, stuffing a handful into his mouth. Sehun watches him chew, and Tao's stomach lurches. It's almost completely dark now, but he can still feel how much Sehun's eyes bore into him. Tao licks the salt off his lips, and in the next moment, Sehun's on him, his mouth rough and one hand squeezing Tao's thigh. His kisses are more urgent now, and Sehun's hand on Tao's cheek is pressing into the skin there, guiding Tao until he's the one leaning over Sehun. Sehun's tongue is hot in Tao's mouth, and insistent. His hand slides down Tao's neck and under his shirt as he leans back, letting Tao nip down his neck and over his shoulder. Sehun's fingers on Tao's stomach are cold from gripping his wet clothes before, and Tao shivers when Sehun trails the letters of his name on Tao's skin. His fingers don't stop, dipping bellow the waistband, and Tao has to muffle a moan into Sehun's collarbone. Sehun's never been this daring before.

"Hun, what are you doing?" Tao asks, and he hates how his voice sounds so weak. He kisses his way back up into Sehun's mouth, but pulls away a little, wanting the answer.

Sehun only squeezes his cock through his wet boxers then quickly gets up.

"I have a spare pair of shorts in my bag," he says. "You should get out of these wet clothes."

Tao's a little dumbfounded, but he realizes Sehun's pulling him towards the public shower and the changing stall that he's noticed earlier. They trip over the pebbles on the way, but Tao doesn't get a chance to get his bearings back before Sehun's pushing him into the changing stall. He grabs Tao's shorts and pulls them down his legs, along with his underwear.

"I don't need help," Tao says, dumbly, and Sehun drops to his knees.

"You sure about that?" he asks. His breath is warm against Tao's cock, and Tao stumbles, his back hitting the wall of the stall.

"Sehun, what the fuck," he says, trying to grab onto Sehun's hair and pull him up. Sehun's hair is too short though, and he doesn't budge, his hand coming up to stroke Tao's half hard cock.

"Just enjoy it," Sehun says, and leans forward, mouthing down Tao's happy trail, his hand on Tao's cock never stilling.

"We can't do this," Tao chokes out. "Not here," he adds as an afterthought.

"Shhh," Sehun hisses, and sucks one of Tao's balls into his mouth. Tao bites his lip so hard he draws blood. Sehun hums and moves to lick up the underside of his cock. Tao's completely hard now, warmth and tension building in his underbelly, and he has to stuff his fist into his mouth. He can't be loud, even if the beach is more or less empty.

Sehun looks up at him, and it's too dark to see him clearly, but it's too much for Tao anyway. He thinks he sees Sehun grin, and then he takes Tao's cock into his mouth, slowly sliding his lips down, one hand gripping what he can't take in.

"Fuck," Tao mumbles, muffling another groan with his fist and griping Sehun's shoulder with his other hand. Sehun hollows his cheeks, and Tao throws his head back. He's barely breathing, and even if he's trying not to, he knows he's being loud. Sehun pulls off him with a pop, but immediately goes down again, deeper this time. He moves faster with every pull and press forward, and Tao hears and feels him moaning around his cock. Tao's stomach feels too tight, muscles in his legs twitching, and Sehun keeps going, even when Tao tries to push him off because he's so, so close.

"Sehunnie," he tries to warn him. Sehun moans loudly in reply, and it's the last push Tao needs, coming in Sehun's mouth, the pleasure spiking in his veins and his heart beating too loud in his ears.

Sehun's lips drag down his cock one last time, and he stays there, tongue pressed against the underside of it as Tao's hips jerks. Sehun's hand moves from his cock to dig nails into Tao's ass.

Tao looks down at him and realizes Sehun's other hand is down his own shorts and Sehun's trembling. His breath hitches again when he realizes Sehun's come too, gotten off even before Tao did, and he finally pushes Sehun off, sliding down the wall.

Sehun immediately latches onto him, giving him a dirty kiss, deep and tasting of seaweed and Tao. Tao grips Sehun's hips and pulls him back. He's still trying to even out his breathing, but the reality of what they've done is catching up to him.

"We could have gotten caught," he points out, even if that's not the most important part here.

Sehun smirks a little. "Well, that was the whole point. I'm pretty sure public sex counts as breaking law," he says. "One more thing down on your list."

Tao's stomach feels heavy in an instant. He's claimed his list is not a bucket list, but with Sehun bringing it up after this, yet again, it feels like there's a bucket of ice cold water dangling above Tao's head, getting fuller and swinging more precariously with each of Sehun's touches. Tao dreads the moment it tips over, already knowing how much the cold shock of it will hurt. Sehun kisses his shoulder then and gets up.

"We should leave though. I didn't plan on actually getting us arrested."

As Sehun stands up, wiping his hands into Tao's discarded damp shorts and pulling new ones out of his backpack, Tao wills the bucket to last a little longer. He hopes there's still place in it before it tips.

~~33\. break a law~~

~~21\. make out on the beach~~ ~~IIII~~ ~~IIII~~

Odeo is beautiful, in that slightly cheesy, over the top, extravagant way. Sehun, in the shade of the trees in the park, curiously touching flowers and teasing Tao about his obsession with the drama filming locations, is beautiful too, in that breathtaking way that love makes you see things. Radiant and untouchable. Only Sehun touches, all the time. He walks too close to Tao so that their arms are pressed together, tangles their fingers when he finds something new thrilling or when yet another view opens up, and pushes into Tao's lower back when he wants him to look at something. He's delightful and ready to please, posing for Tao's short videos, waving at the camera or just goofing off in front of it like it isn't there, like it's Tao only whose attention he wants to hold unconditionally.

By the time they have to leave, Tao's a little lightheaded with it. He knows he's too quiet while they stand on the deck of the ferry, watching the island disappear. Sehun only reaches over for Tao's hand. He rubs his thumb over Tao's wrist before slipping his forearm underneath Tao's. In the end Sehun's palm slides against Tao's, and Sehun plays with Tao's fingers.

Tao thinks about it again, about asking Sehun what's happening to them. How they managed to slip from best friends reconnecting to this. It's comfortable, Sehun always in his personal space, even more so than before, Sehun kissing him, Sehun pressing his back to Tao's in bed so they fall asleep breathing in sync. And it's not that Tao doesn't question it, only he doesn't know what answers he wants to hear. In his mind, he sees the bucket swaying more dangerously. So he just lets things happen, lets Sehun decide on what happens when, and lets him always reach over first, not wanting to assume. He presses his palm more against Sehun's now, and the corner of Sehun's lips quirks up a bit. It's okay, Tao thinks he's saying. Tao closes his eyes and lets the wind ruffle his hair. It hit his face so hard his skin gets dry and scratchy, and Tao lets it carry his worries a little further for the time being.

When the boat gets back to Geojedo, Sehun is already pulling him towards their car.

"Tonight is going to be so awesome," he says, and Tao doesn't doubt it.

That doesn't mean his idea of the awesome night isn't absolutely off. He doesn't expect a town fair full of bike riders and loud music and street stands and old traveler carnival rides. He certainly doesn't expect eating so many hot dogs, which he's helped barbecue, that his jaw aches and his stomach feels as heavy as lead. He's so full that his eyes are about to pop out, but Sehun's shouting that he's behind, "come on you better win this! That's it! Keep it going!"

Tao feels nausea coming.

"Actually, just keep it down!" Sehun shouts then, his eyes a little wide, probably _finally_ realizing Tao's state.

Tao bursts out laughing despite it all, pieces of bread flying everywhere.

"You're so gross. But now get one more down, you can do it!" Sehun shouts. He's standing in the first row, stomping his feet, and his voice is getting rough from cheering and the nonsense he's shouting. Tao doesn't think he can eat any more, but he picks up one more hot dog and the gong sounds off just as he swallows the last part of it. Then Sehun's jumping over the barrier and barreling onto the stage. The organizer is raising Tao's hand up, and Sehun's pulling him out of his seat and jumping around him like a little kid.

"I can't believe you actually ate all that, but you fucking won!"

Tao doesn't want to see a hot dog for the rest of his life.

~~6\. have a barbecue~~

~~49\. win a food eating contest~~

"What did I win anyway?" Tao asks, later, after Sehun's rubbed his back for about half an hour as Tao tried to breathe through the nausea on one of the benches far away from the food stalls. Sehun looked almost remorseful about signing Tao up, but his eyes were smiling, and Tao knew he wasn't really regretting it. They've ventured back onto the fair after a while, and Tao's been making Sehun eat one weird flavor of shaved ice from each stand selling it, in revenge.

"You, my friend, won something super awesome. And we're almost there," Sehun says, his tongue tripping over the words from how frozen it is. It makes Tao laugh, but it also makes him want to suck on Sehun's tongue to warm it up again. Sehun licks the corner of his lips then, and Tao makes a tiny noise under his breath, forgetting himself and getting caught watching. Sehun smirks, grabbing Tao's hand and pulling him to the side, behind one of the less interesting stalls selling dried squids, and kisses him. Tao pulls him closer, fingers closing around the back of Sehun's neck. He gets to suck on Sehun's tongue just like he wants to until Sehun's groaning, his hands pulling at Tao's shirt so it stretches uncomfortably around his neck. Tao pulls back, and it's Sehun who seems a bit more dazed for once, only licking his lips and watching Tao's own.

"I'm almost tempted to get more ice," he says after a moment. "Almost." He scrunches his nose and rubs at his stomach.

"I'll let you off the hook if you finally tell me what I've won."

\+ ~~_eat as many types of shaved ice as possible color_~~

A ride on a big motorbike, sitting in front of a biker that smells like leather and gas and helps him navigate the side streets, is not what Tao has expected. He's shouting happily at every corner and little acceleration, and the biker is making fun of him, but doesn't hush him. When Tao looks to the right, it's Sehun, on another bike, who's yelling for him to shut up.

The biker with Sehun has one hand splayed across Sehun's stomach. It's only there to keep him safe because Sehun's an awfully restless person on most occasions. Tao knows this. He knows Sehun has to wiggle and move constantly, even more so when excited. Still, Tao looks away, focusing on trying to steer 'his' bike on his own. He doesn't want to think about how when they found the bikers, Sehun flirted his way into getting a ride too. He claimed his cheering had a big part in Tao's victory, so it wasn't fair only Tao got the prize. At least three bikers practically fell over their own feet, offering to give him a ride. Sehun gave Tao a playful wink and pouted at the bikers, choosing the bike he liked the most, the biggest one with bright red fuel tank and polished handle bars. Sehun was as smug as a cat that got the cream when the biker pulled out the keys and motioned for him to sit down, with no complaint.

Now they're coming back, and Tao's asking all the questions. The biker shows him everything he asks about, and when Tao gets off the bike, he gives him a light smirk and a nudges his shoulder.

"Go have some more fun with your pretty boyfriend now," he says, and nods towards where Sehun's still sitting on the bike.

Tao splutters, but his guy seems pretty laid back, so he only takes one quick selca with him, bows his head in gratitude once more, and goes to peel Sehun off the other bike.

~~36\. ride a motorbike~~

It's getting late, but Sehun insists they ride the big old Ferris wheel that creaks more than Tao really likes.

"I know it's on the list, but I'm sure we can find another one," he says.

"You know, not everything I do I only do because of your summer list. I do these things because I genuinely want to," Sehun says, offhandedly.

Something washes over Tao, something like hope and dread mixed together, and his heart is in his throat yet again. "Yeah?" he asks, catching up to Sehun, and hooking a finger into the pocket of Sehun's jeans.

"Yeah," Sehun nods. "So let's go."

 

"I've come to the conclusion that making out on Ferris wheel when you have a suitable subject to do it with is not at all about romance but about killing the time it takes to get to the top," Sehun says, as their cabin sways a little and jerks up another notch, the joints squeaking.

"I'm not sure if you're saying that I am or that I'm not a suitable subject," Tao dares to say. It's conveniently too dark in here. His cheeks are burning with a sudden blush. He's holding his breath.

"What do you think?" Sehun asks. His ankle hooks behind Tao's, their knees banging together when Sehun moves forward.

"I wonder if you're already bored enough," Tao says instead of, _I'd kiss you on spinning teacups too._

"You're so stupid," Sehun announces, and reaches for Tao's shirt, kissing him, his lips warm and insistent.

Sehun swears he didn't know about the fireworks they hear as they descend. They pull apart to watch the colors bursting then fading in the skies, the view disappearing as they get lower. Just before it's their turn to get off, Sehun kisses the corner of Tao's lips once again.

"You know, if we'd be playing bingo, I'd call today a black out," he says.

Tao swipes a thumb under Sehun's eye and doesn't even try to stop the fluttering in his stomach.

"I agree."

~~41\. see fireworks~~

~~4\. ride Ferris wheel~~

A part of the reason why they're not on Jeju yet is because Tao  
knows that after that, the road will only take them back up towards Seoul. So he doesn't protest when Sehun makes him go on a "treasure hunt." He gives Tao _clues_ , sending him to different corners of the beach and to the local stores, while he sits on the rock by the water and laughs at him. Tao doesn't find a treasure. He realizes though that Sehun must have snuck out of the guest house to go talk to the shops' staff, to get them to cooperate and hand Tao different things or clues when he comes in. He lamely thinks Sehun doing that for him is worth treasuring.

He voices his discontent loudly anyway, just for the decorum.

"Well, you already have me, so I don't know why you're complaining," Sehun says. He smirks then jumps down from the rock and sneaks a quick kiss to Tao's cheek even if there are people all around them.

Tao does, however, end up with flippers and goggles after an hour and a half of "hunting," and they go scuba diving together. The pictures of them in full gear and the video of Sehun waddling out of water in his flippers and with goggles still on are priceless.

 ~~39\. find a treasure~~ _(it totally counted, okay! you totally found a starfish)_

~~31\. go scuba diving~~

But now, there's only one more night left before they board the morning ferry. And of course, they can't find a place to stay the night, yet again. Unless they want to sleep in the car, parked somewhere outside the city. They've done it before, especially in the inland, but Tao's not too keen on it.

"Actually, I bet there's an available room in this one," Sehun says, as they drive by a hotel, neon lights blaring, most of the windows dark.

"That's a love hotel," Tao deadpans.

"So? It's also like a beach front resort," Sehun points out, and it's true, in a way. The hotel's just across the road from the rocky shore. "I bet the views are amazing."

"I'm sure that's why people spend a night in it," Tao says, but he's slowed down the car even more.

"I'm not sure why you don't think this is a great idea, but we could make it a thing, if it'd help," Sehun replies. He turns down the radio, already looking out of the window for a place where they could turn around to head back.

"A thing?" Tao questions.

"Yes. Add 'sleep in a love hotel' to your list. We could pick some weird room for entertainment purposes." Tao snorts a little, part in disgust, part amused by Sehun advocating this. "I mean. Unless you lead some wild secret life in college that you didn't tell me about, you don't really have a record of visiting love hotels too much. It could be an adventure."

Tao's still not sure how he feels about sleeping in a room that most people rent just to have sex in.

"Plus it will be cheap," Sehun adds.

"I can't believe I'm kind of sold on this. Have you missed your calling in love hotel marketing?"

Sehun shrugs. "If they let me, I'll be much better at checking how much they paid for marketing and how effective it was."

"You are a scary man," Tao laughs, and turns left so they can head back to the love hotel.

 

Obviously there's a room available. At least they don't go through with Sehun's plan of renting a themed room, though not for lack of Sehun trying.

"I'm not sure I could sleep with some chains hanging over my head," Tao says exasperatedly, and Sehun relents.

"Fine, fine, you prude," he says, and lets Tao ask for some clean room with a sea view. The guy at the reception gives him a weird look at that. Tao thinks it's ironic that that's the first thing he's fazed by since they came in.

 

Sehun takes a shower first while Tao tries not to look too closely at the sheets or anything else. The room's pretty simple though, and it calms him a little that there's no crude art on the walls, that the light is soft, and the sheets are plain white and not too scratchy or old. He's still on the edge, an inexplicable thrum of anxiety running through him. He quickly switches with Sehun in the doorway of the bathroom, hoping the shower will help. He does feel sticky with sweat and humidity. Plus their choice of beach for the day didn't have a fresh water shower, so they just dried in the sun and put some of the less-clean clothes on before they drove away. He spends a long time under the warmish spray of the water before he emerges.

When Tao opens the door to the bedroom, Sehun's sprawled on the bed, legs and arms spread wide, and he's bobbing his head a little to the music coming out of his phone. It's some dance track, and Sehun's left leg twitches like he's about to burst into a sudden dance move. He's making funny faces to the changing beat, attempting to beat box at one point, and Tao's grabbing his phone and starting to film before he's caught. It doesn't last long because he can't stop himself from laughing, and Sehun opens his eyes, looking up at the camera. He just narrows his eyes a little but then keeps making silly faces that turn Tao's snorts of laughter into peels of it that shake his body to the core. Sehun's still-bushy eyebrows can do amazing things. Tao steps back a little to take all of Sehun in, noticing yet again how good he looks when loose-limbed and relaxed, skin tanned and smooth, thick neck and strong shoulders more prominent in one of his white tank tops that rides up on his stomach from constant moving. His sun tattoo is almost gone already, but Tao's eyes are drawn to the play of shadows across it, to Sehun's hipbone. Sehun's always this ball of energy about to burst, and Tao can't look away.

"Put that down already," Sehun says a few minutes later, playfully launching at Tao and snatching his phone away. He sets an alarm on it so they don't miss the ferry and places it next to his own on the night stand. Another song ends, and there's no new one after that. Sehun moves just a little to make space for Tao on the bed. It's not too wide, but at least their ankles aren't sticking out of it. The lights go out, and Tao feels Sehun moving around on his side. He thinks he can't find a comfortable position, so he reaches out to pull at him. Sehun rolls and ends up with his back pressed to Tao's chest. Tao hears something clicking, and Sehun keeps fidgeting, so Tao dares to slip a leg between Sehun's, hoping to ground him like that.

"What's up?" he asks, running a hand down Sehun's side. It's a lot that he's daring to do, but Sehun always wants them close at night lately, so it's not completely new either.

There's one more click, and then something hits Tao's head.

"What on earth?" he asks, searching in the dark for the object and finding a small tube. "What's this?"

"So, I was thinking," Sehun says then, and takes a deep breath that Tao feels his own chest rising with. "That we should honor the place and the occasion, and you should fuck me tonight."

Tao drops the tube like it's burning. "I mean, I even found the lube. The night stand is super well stocked." Sehun tries to be so nonchalant about this, but Tao knows, without having to see his face, that it's just a front he's putting up.

This is what the tension in Tao's body was all about. This whole place just screamed danger from the moment he saw the pink neon lights. He needs a minute or ten to gather his wits before he choses the right thing to do. He drops his head forwards, forehead pressed between Sehun's shoulder blades. Sehun is breathing a little faster now, but he's quiet. Tao can only think of how it feels having Sehun in his arms like this, Sehun's skin warm under his sleep shirt, Tao's leg wedged between Sehun's. It's ... temptation and want. He hears rustling.

"Come on," Sehun says. "Don't make me take it back." Sehun's breath hitches on his last word, and Tao realizes Sehun's touching himself. He slides a hand over Sehun's arm, fingers sliding across his elbow. Sehun's hand is in his own shorts, and Tao doesn't stop until he's covering it with his own. Sehun doesn't tense, doesn't flinch even a little, just pushes back against Tao's chest and mutters a low "yes." Tao swipes a thumb over the head of Sehun's cock, and Sehun gets frantic fast, wriggling and kicking Tao with the heels of his feet.

"Help me get these off," he says, pulling on his shorts, but he manages on his own. He swats at Tao's hand that's still gripping Sehun's cock. "Lube, just get on with the lube," he says.

"Sehun," Tao says slowly, finally finding his voice, and Sehun pushes his bare ass against Tao again. It's so blatant and hot, and Tao's head is spinning because Sehun's making all these little noises. He kisses Sehun's shoulder, tries to slow this down a little.

"Sehunnie," he says again, and Sehun lets out a shaky laugh.

"Please," he says, a little unsure. "Can we just, please," he tries again, reaching back to grab Tao's hand and move it so it rests on the curve of his ass. Sehun pulls his leg a little higher towards his stomach and glances back. "Want you," he says.

Tao wants Sehun too, so much. He tries to kiss him, only catching the side of his mouth as Sehun turns back to the front with a sigh. Tao runs his hand over Sehun's ass and squeezes, kissing Sehun's shoulder, mouthing at the skin not covered by his shirt. He finds the lube with his other hand and props himself up a little.

"Are you comfortable?" he asks, and it's dark, but Tao sees Sehun nod. He has his hand around his own cock again, face half pressed into the pillow, and Tao kisses the nape of his neck, leaves his mouth there as he presses a slick finger between Sehun's ass cheeks. Sehun groans, and Tao pushes more, first finger slipping in just a little.

"Don't drag it out," Sehun murmurs, when Tao only pulls back out and massages the tight circle of muscles. Tao takes his time anyway. Sehun's breathing is getting more ragged, and by the time Tao has two fingers curled inside him, he's loud and his body is tense. He keeps pushing back against Tao, forever so impatient, while Tao doesn't want to hurt him, doesn't want to rush because that means getting close to the end of this. He keeps biting and licking over Sehun's ribs, Sehun's shirt rolled up his back.

"Sehunnie," Tao murmurs, scissoring his fingers before pushing them deeper.

Sehun gasps loudly then goes still. Tao feels him clench around his fingers, and he realizes Sehun's come.

"Fuck, fuck," Sehun's muttering, and Tao pulls his fingers away, holds Sehun steady by his hip while Sehun trembles as he rides the orgasm out. "Fuck, don't stop," he gasps again.

Tao grips Sehun's shoulder and pulls until Sehun's lying on his back, Tao hovering over him.

"Lights," Sehun says, and he throws a hand out, fumbling around the nightstand and eventually managing to turn a small lamp on. Now that Tao sees him, his breath catches yet again. Sehun's eyes are wide, cheeks flushed, parted lips slick and so pink. His shirt sticks to his heaving chest, and when Tao looks down, Sehun wipes his hand on it and lifts up a little to pull it off.

"You're so," Tao tries to say, and Sehun only reaches for him, pulling him into a messy kiss.

"You're too slow," Sehun whispers against Tao's ear, and pulls Tao's t-shirt over his head. Tao drops a kiss to Sehun's chest and then another and another, sucking a bruise over his collarbone. He hears another click, and Sehun's slicking Tao's fingers with more lube. "Now come on, one more," he says.

"Fuck," Tao mutters. His cock aches in his boxers, and he can't help but rub a little against Sehun's thigh.

"Yeah," Sehun agrees, and pulls his legs up.

Three fingers are almost easy now that Sehun's loose and relaxed. They keep kissing, nipping at each other's lips, and Sehun manages to push Tao's boxers down his ass, to his mid-thighs while Tao twists his wrist and presses his fingers deeper, faster. The next time he crooks them, Sehun moans into his mouth, his thighs squeezing on each side of Tao.

"Right there," he whispers. Tao pushes against the same place, and Sehun's sounds turn louder.

"Do it," he says, "Do it now." He's searching for the lube again and covering Tao's cock in it, and Tao watches, noticing how Sehun's cock is hard, long and slightly curved against his stomach. He pulls out his fingers and swipes them over the head of Sehun's cock. Sehun's stomach muscles contract.

"You're so amazing," he says at last. "So great," he whispers, and he's saying too little, but Sehun's pupils widen and his hands loop around Tao's neck. He looks straight into Tao's eyes, seems almost awed, almost as stunned as Tao about what is about to happen, and Tao holds his cock and pushes into Sehun, slowly.

"Finally," Sehun wheezes, like he's wanted this for weeks, months or years, and Tao's trembling to the core above him. Sehun feels so hot around him, muscles fluttering in anticipation. His fingers pull at the short hair on the back of Tao's neck, and Tao rolls his hips just lightly. Sehun's head falls back into the mattress, eyes closing, mouth opened in a whine, and Tao pulls back. His hips snap back in before he can make himself stop, and Sehun's nails scratch against his neck.

"Hun-ah, are you," Tao's barely breathing. "You okay?"

Sehun groans in reply, head nodding yes and his hand sliding down to grab at Tao's ass. "Faster, more," he says, and Tao ups his pace. He pushes in with more strength, smashing his face into the crook of Sehun's neck, moaning and biting and kissing there. Sehun's trying to move with him, his ankles hooked behind Tao's thighs, but Tao's too frantic now for Sehun to follow. Sehun's so good, feels so perfect, and Tao's stretched too thin already, his thrusts shallow and faster. Sehun starts saying his name, over and over again, choking on it, and it's almost too late when Tao realizes he wants something. He slips his hand between them, pressing Sehun's cock more into his stomach. He's almost gone himself, but he manages to pull out, despite Sehun whining at him. He holds himself on his knees, one hand around both of them, moving fast. It takes two more strokes before he comes. He slumps back a little, still pulling on Sehun's cock and pressing fingers of his other hand into Sehun, scrambling to push into the right place. Sehun's sobbing, writhing in the sheets, cock twitching and ass clenching on Tao's fingers.

"Come, Hun," Tao breathes, watching in fascination, and Sehun does, shuddering, body wrecked by a hoarse moan. His limbs go limp, shoulders pressed deep into the bed, as he comes down from his high.

Tao sits back on his heels, pulling his hands away from Sehun at last. He's so tired, and they're both a mess, but a sated, blissed out mess. Sehun wriggles in the sheets, fingers pulling at them.

"Thank you," he mumbles, without looking at Tao, and Tao leans down, kissing up his jaw. Sehun smiles a little, pressing a hand to Tao's cheek so he can pull Tao's lower lip between his own, and Tao feels himself calming down. This kiss is already familiar, soothing them both.

"Too tired to move," Sehun says. Tao noses at his neck, hums in agreement, but forces himself out of bed. He grabs a towel from the bathroom and cleans first Sehun then himself the best he can. When he comes back, Sehun looks asleep, breath slow and even. Tao slides under the covers, and Sehun stirs then scoots back. Tao falls asleep with his hand around Sehun's waist, his chest pressed to Sehun's back yet again. He's too exhausted to let his mind wander.

\+ ~~_sleep in a love hotel_~~

When Sehun's phone rings, he's asleep, curled up half in Tao's lap, half in his seat on the main deck, and Tao's just wondering if Sehun plans on sleeping through the entire ferry ride, just like he's slept through the short journey to the docks and through the boarding. Sehun jerks away, a deer caught in the headlights, then searches through his pockets for his phone.

"Joonmyun-hyung," he mutters, and he gets up. Suddenly his shoulders are tense, back straight as a ruler. He picks up and walks a little away from Tao. When he hangs up a while later, he doesn't come back, instead stepping outside and moving to lean against the railing. Tao follows, only stopping to buy them juice from a vending machine.

"Something's wrong?" he asks, handing Sehun the drink then placing a hand on his lower stomach tentatively.

"No," Sehun shakes his head, but his lips are turned down at the corners and his brows are furrowed. "I guess ... every time hyung calls, I half expect him to tell me they canceled my contract." Tao moves his hand to massage at the nape of Sehun's neck, and slowly, the tension lessens.

"Sehun, you not only flailed about your summer internships in that firm to me until my ears almost fell off, you also showed me your internship evaluations, and they fucking loved you there. They're not getting rid of you," Tao says, watching the waves breaking against the side of the ferry.

"Yes, but normally, people don't start only two years after finishing their studies. I might have forgotten everything they taught me. They might think I've forgotten everything they taught me."

"You did what you had to do," Tao cuts him off. He knows it wasn't easy on Sehun to decide to only do his service after finishing school. But when most of their friends enrolled, Sehun's brother was still doing his service, and his mom just had a joint replacement surgery and wasn't recovering all that well. Sehun didn't want to leave her alone. Tao also knows that's when they really stuck together, became even closer, looking to each other for support. He snaps back from the memories. "You'll be back in the swing of things in no time," he says firmly, and Sehun frowns a little, like he doesn't believe him.

"Maybe." He pulls Tao's arm away from his neck to play with the fingers on his hand.

"So what did Joonmyun-hyung say?" Tao asks.

"My orientation starts in three weeks."

It's quiet again after that. Sehun slides their palms together and squeezes Tao's hand. "We have to be back in Seoul in less than three weeks."

Tao smiles ruefully. "Well, there always _was_ an end date to this ultimate road trip. Look at it this way. That means we still have more than two weeks for Jeju and west coast. Just enjoy it."

"Yes, but," Sehun starts, and Tao shushes him.

"Don't start the countdown. Not yet." He turns Sehun so they're facing each other. "And listen well. You're good at what you've chosen to do. They promised to wait for you, and they haven't gone back on that promise for two years. They won't do it now. You also have an awesome mentor waiting for you there, so he'll make sure to teach you well. You'll do great. I know you'll do great."

Sehun nods. Tao tries to give him an encouraging smile. "Okay," Sehun says at last, and his smile is still a little forced, but it's there. "But I'm warning you Huang Zitao, if you take me to another genitalia themed park, I'm stealing your car and leaving you on top of some very tall mountain. Don't think I don't know there are several of them on Jeju."

Tao blinks. "I wouldn't dream of it," he says.

"Good," Sehun smiles wider. "If you want to see a cock, you just need to ask me, okay?" Sehun really isn't beating around the bush. Tao swallows, a picture of Sehun on his back, his pretty cock hard and twitching a little as Tao fingered him, vivid in his mind.

"About that," he tries to say.

Sehun raises an eyebrow. "Just enjoy it," he throws back at Tao, smirking a little.

Tao shakes his head and drops it.

"Now, let's go. I can't believe it's going to be this easy, but I noticed the bar on the other side of the deck. People have been carrying pineapples with straws away from it, so I need you to treat me to a drink."

~~12\. drink something out of a pineapple~~

"This should teach you that my list isn't meant to be a quick race to the finish," Tao says, as Sehun manages to scramble out of the hammock, hissing the entire time. He wobbles towards their tent, cursing under his breath, and Tao would laugh, but his thighs are burning too as he basically falls out of their net.

Sehun giggles. "You just looked like some gawky kitten," he says. He watches Tao get up from the ground then scratches his stomach, looking around their camping station and wrinkling his nose. "Besides, you're just upset I made you ride a pony instead of a horse, but I still insist it counts. Plus," he runs his hands on the insides of his thighs, bringing his shorts up a little, "I don't think I'm willingly riding another horse in the next few months."

Tao's eyes are still fixed on Sehun's thighs. Sehun has been spending practically their entire trip in variations of loose, sometimes way too short pants, and his tan tampers off gradually into the paler, smoother skin. It's just a little fascinating.

"You know, I was expecting some stupid joke there, but I see you're too busy for that," Sehun says, and Tao lifts his eyes guiltily.

"The trails we walked on were beautiful?" he says, distracted and a little ashamed for being caught staring.

But Sehun's only looking at him with amusement and maybe a bit of fondness. "I think I should add 'clean up before going to sleep' to that list too. It's kind of a mess here."

"I'll clean up," Tao says, pushing Sehun to sit down. Sehun doesn't stay still for long though, and soon he's busy helping to pack their things. They take turns going to wash up into the camp's communal area, and when Tao comes back, their station is all packed up, backpacks leaning against a tree. Sehun has an open pocketknife in his hand.

"I think the fact that you managed to get the fire going last night and then performed some complicated victory dance around it makes this tree perfect for a little marking," he says, making the first cut. Tao finishes writing yesterday's date in slick cuts into the bark, making sure they aren't too deep. When he's done, he's spun against the tree and kissed.

"Next time, don't take so long to brush your teeth," Sehun says when he pulls away. "Let's get breakfast."

 ~~10\. go horseback riding~~ _(mountain ponies qualify too)_

~~24\. sleep in a hammock~~

~~32\. start a fire without matches or a lighter~~

~~29\. dance barefoot in the forest~~

~~45\. carve something into a tree~~

"I'm not racing you up Mount Halla," Tao says dryly. They've been walking for some time now, and Sehun seems to want to be at the top as soon as possible. "Be patient, Hun-ah," he adds, hooking his index finger with Sehun's briefly. Sehun takes the camera from him and starts filming down, then up, the stairs they're taking. Tao has to pull at his t-shirt to stop him from walking into a couple of old ladies also making their way up. Tao wonders how long it'll take them. They probably have much more patience than Sehun though. One of the ladies smiles at him in thanks.

"That's a wonderful hair color," she says, and Sehun snorts.

"It was blue once," Tao says demurely. He can't believe he's mourning that deep blue, but for some reason his hair turned greenish instead of lighter blue, very quickly, and it spoils his selca game. He blends too much with the green around them.

"Oh, but green is good too," the other old lady adds, and pats his hand in assurance.

Sehun can't stop laughing.

"Isn't my friend mean?" Tao asks their new companions. They slowed down enough to walk behind these ladies, and he notices how carefully they take every step up.

"But he has a beautiful smile, so I'm sure you forgive him," one of them says.

"Ah," Tao pouts. "He's definitely a charmer. He almost tripped over you, and you're already excusing him."

The women both laugh at that, and the same lady as before pats his hand again. "Don't worry, you're very handsome too," she says.

All of them walk like that for a while, Tao a little curious about the ladies now. Introductions are made, and it makes him smile as they insist on being called by their first names. Soon-ja halmoni and Soon-hee halmoni are apparently new friends. They met at a book club for seniors and decided to take a trip to spend their savings together. They call themselves wild and free, and Tao wonders what kind of books they've been reading in that club. Twenty minutes later, Soon-hee is holding onto Tao's hand, using it as leverage while Sehun walks behind Soon-ja carefully. Tao chuckles at how he seems to think she'll fall backwards any minute now, and he has his hands out and spread wide, as if ready to catch her.

"You should have asked your grandson to accompany you on a hike like this. I bet he could have carried you up," Sehun muses, when Soon-ja proudly talks about her grandson and how she may just live to have grand-grand children. "Tao here, for example, gives excellent piggy back rides."

Soon-hee wavers a little then, and suddenly Sehun's eyes are shining.

"Actually, he could totally do that now too," he says.

"Hey, why are you volunteering me again?" Tao swats at Sehun.

"Because I'm the best authority on your capabilities in this area." Sehun shrugs. "And I remember a certain point on a certain list."

Soon-hee's fingers hold onto Tao's forearm much tighter by now. Tao looks up, and they aren't _that_ far from the top.

"I bet you've carried heavier stuff on your back in the army," he says offhandedly. "Let's do it together."

Sehun looks like he might protest, but then he's moving his backpack onto his front.

"Hop on, halmoni," he says to Soon-ja.

They both try to protest, but Sehun's so good at coaxing them to do it, showing off Tao's and his arm muscles to prove they can carry them. Five minutes later, they're walking up the mountain with a tiny old lady each on their backs.

Soon-ja joins in when Soon-he starts to sing an old song, and Sehun cheers, a little winded, instantly proclaiming himself a fan of the Soon-duo. With a few breaks to catch their breaths, they make it to the top. Tao's noticed people taking pictures of them, and he asks someone at the top to take a few with his phone too, before they let the ladies down. They share their snacks with Sehun and Tao and pat their hair like they're kids. Sehun's so proud of himself, and Tao just basks in all that affection.

They part at the top, Sehun and Tao ready to descent much quicker.

"We actually didn't think we'd make it to the top," Soon-hee tells Tao, squeezing his hand for the last time. "But we'll manage on the way down. You make sure to watch out for your cute friend." She's smiling almost conspiratorially, and Tao tells himself he's reading too much into all this. People can't keep implying Sehun and Tao are boyfriends, definitely not cute old ladies in their seventies. He just nods, bows once again, and joins Sehun for one last glance over the small pond in the crater and the island spread beneath them.

 ~~19\. climb a mountain~~ II

~~37\. give a stranger a piggy back ride~~

"Tao, this is Yixing, and he's awesome." There's a man sitting next to Sehun at their table in the restaurant they've been eating at when Tao returns from the bathroom. "He's a Jeju scientist," Sehun explains.

"That makes no sense," Tao say, eyeing Yixing carefully. He already has a hand on Sehun's thigh, and he looks a little drunk. So does Sehun, cheeks flushed from alcohol and eyes a little hazed.

"I'm a botanist. I've been working on Jeju for a few years now," Yixing says in soft Chinese.

"Hyung, no. Talk in your cute Korean, not in Chinese." Sehun pouts at him, and Yixing rubs his knee to appease him.

"You're a cutie," he coos. Sehun seems so taken in with the way Yixing's mouth moves, and Tao's stomach churns, his fists clenching so that his hands don't shake.

"Your boyfriend is a very affectionate drunk, isn't he?" Yixing says to Tao then, again in Chinese, "very, very cute." Tao feels himself deflate like a balloon. He decides not to protest the assumption this time. Yixing is smiling at him knowingly. 'I mean no harm,' his droopy eyes seem to be saying. "I am too," he adds.

"I'm not cute," Sehun mumbles, finally pulling Tao to sit on the other side of him. "Don't think I didn't understand that. Tao used to call me cute all the time when we first met."

"Used to?" Yixing cocks his head.

"I made him stop," Sehun says firmly.

"Aren't you regretting it?" Yixing asks, seriously.

"Hmmm," Sehun hums. He sounds sleepy and not really there anymore. "Did you put the instructions down into my phone?" Without context Tao is lost.

Yixing nods, finally pulling his hand away from Sehun's knee and taking a sip from his beer, eyes twinkling as he looks at Tao from over his glass.

They don't stay for much longer after that, but Yixing helps Tao drag a drunk Sehun to their guest house, so Tao definitely deems him to be good people. They exchange numbers, and Yixing leaves, singing an old Chinese folk song under his breath and walking from one side of the narrow road to the other.

 

"It's perfect," Tao say, absolutely stunned as he stands on the edge of a waterfall. It's not a big one, but the falling water is still loud and just a little intimidating. There's no one around. They walked off the official path some time ago, Sehun hesitating a little, but eventually nodding to himself and pulling Tao behind him.

"I've got this," he's said.

He definitely did have this, because he's pumped his fist and smiled smugly when they arrived.

"Did you know it was here?" Tao asks, incredulous. He's already pulling his camera out of his rucksack.

"Of course. Yixing said we can stay the night too," he adds, already stripping off his t-shirt. Tao is momentarily distracted by his tummy, but then he shakes his head.

"Wait, what? Yixing?"

Sehun only nods. "I only had to buy him one beer too. He's now the coolest Chinese person I know," Sehun says, very seriously.

"Hey!" Tao grabs Sehun by the hips. "Do you want to be thrown down into the water? Take that back!"

Sehun only tips his head back in laughter. "Well, it's not like I wasn't planning to jump," he says. "But I was kind of hoping we could do it together."

Tao blinks.

"And you're right. I guess Lu Han-hyung is still the coolest Chinese person I know. Mostly because I can crash at his place in Beijing any time. Or, so he says."

"I'm really going to toss you," Tao says, threateningly. "Explain, now."

"Okay, okay," Sehun relents, turning in Tao's hold easily and pushing Tao's t-shirt up too, trying to take it off. "Yixing works nearby. He knows this place well, does research here sometimes. He was talking about it in the restaurant. And well, I was looking for a waterfall that's not swamped with tourists, so I bought him that beer and flirted all his secrets out of him."

"He wasn't flirting with you," Tao says distractedly.

Sehun only snorts. "You always focus on the important things. But whatever. He said it's safe to jump in if we jump a little forward. No dangerous stones, and the water is deep enough. So let's go," Sehun's pulling at Tao's hand.

"No, wait, wait. Let me check."

"You want to jump first?" Sehun sounds absolutely dejected.

"No, you idiot. I'm going to walk around and see for myself. No offense, but Yixing was just as drunk as you last night, and I don't want you breaking your leg or cracking your head because of this."

Sehun gives him this strange look, a bit amazed, but lets go of his hand. "I want to tell you to live a little but, ... fine, go."

Tao strides down the side of the waterfall, finding a place to drop his rucksack that he brought with him and wading into the water. It's cold, and he shudders a bit. Sehun laughs at him from above, and his laughter resonates around the place, carries even over the sound of water. Tao moves further away from the shore, and soon he can't reach the bottom. The water's clear, and he can see everything under it, all the way to the edge of the cliff. Yixing was right, but Tao's still glad he checked. When he gets out, he looks around. Sehun's impatient, already practicing the takeoff, and he looks super silly doing it. He makes a face when Tao pulls his camera out, walking around until he finds a flatter rock, throwing his rucksack on it and positioning the camera on top. He hits the record button and hurries up to join Sehun. He's breathing hard when he arrives, and Sehun's in that state of absolute excitement again, radiating with energy and joy.

"Took you long enough," he says, lacing their fingers together. "Ready?"

They jump together, and Sehun doesn't let go of Tao's hand until their feet hit the water, screaming on top of his lungs.

When they emerge, Sehun's spluttering about doing it again, already swimming to the shore. Tao lets him go first, still a little winded. He floats on the water for a while, watching Sehun, wet and slightly shivering, make his way back up. He swims to the shore just in time to take hold of his camera and record Sehun jumping again, making sure it's all there, perfect.

They jump down one more time, together. By then Sehun's lips are a little blue, but he starts swimming towards where the water falls down heavily.

"Hey, come back?" Tao shouts after him.

"You come here!" Sehun orders. He knows Tao will follow.

Sehun finds a flat rock to stand on, near the edge of the waterfall, and Tao barely registers how he disappears behind the curtain of water. There's exciting shouting, and Tao quickly swims to where Sehun was standing just now.

"This is so cool," he breathes out, when he finds himself being pulled behind the water. He wants to ask if this is also something Yixing told Sehun, but Sehun pulls at his shorts and kisses him, his energy and excitement making the kiss harsh and rushed.

"Sehunnie," Tao murmurs, but Sehun only pulls him closer, both of them squeezed into the narrow space behind the water that pounds overwhelmingly loud in Tao's ears.

They kiss for a while, Tao wrapping his hands around Sehun's waist, one hand resting low on the small of his back, and Sehun's own hands in Tao's hair, playing with his earrings. Tao gets to suck a bruise behind Sehun's ear, to kiss down his jaw and bite over his collarbones, holding onto him until they're both shivering, water spraying them from one side, cold stone cooling them from the other. Tao's head is spinning at the way their chests are pressed together, and he can feel every one of Sehun's noises rumbling out of him. Sehun's lips get more and more cold though, so Tao pushes at his shoulder a little to make him stop.

"We need to get out of here."

Sehun sighs, dipping in for one last kiss. "Fine. Kissing under the waterfall accomplished," he mutters, and Tao freezes.

The water all around them suddenly reminds him of the bucket he's almost forgotten, the one dangling over his head.

Sehun seems to notice the change in his mood, even as Tao tries to force his face to stay blank. He runs his cold fingers down Tao's sides.

"We should do it again later, though," Sehun says. "I kind of really like it."

 ~~17\. swim in a waterfall~~  
  
\+ ~~_kiss under a waterfall_~~  
  
"The green is really impressive," Sehun says later, as they sprawl on one of the flat rocks by the water. Sehun's lying on his side, their legs tangled, and he's running his hands through Tao's hair. Tao's trying hard not think about how, soon, he will have to dye it back to black, how there's a deadline on his awful hairstyle too. He tries not to wonder whether Sehun will still comb his fingers through his hair, massaging the back of his neck, when it's back to the boring color.

"Shut up," he murmurs instead, when Sehun keeps chuckling.

"Make me," Sehun challenges.

Tao reaches over and kisses him. He doesn't realize how he's been so forceful about it until Sehun drops on top of him. He stops, but Sehun bites his lip, groaning unhappily at the sudden break, and Tao can't ever say no to him. Sehun wants this. At least for now, Sehun wants to be kissing Tao, so Tao pushes his tongue back into his mouth and settles on relearning Sehun's taste and the noises he makes.

 

"I can't believe Yixing gave all this away for one beer," Tao marvels as they climb a hill behind where they set up their tent by the waterfall.

"He didn't. He gave it away for my pretty face and amazing ass," Sehun retorts.

This time, Tao only laughs at him. It's not completely dark yet, but soon it will be, and other then their flashlights, there's no superficial light anywhere near them.

"I can't guarantee a falling star though," Sehun says, almost apologetically, as he sets down their blanket. "I checked, and there's no forecast of any meteor showers for the next month or so."

Tao plops down on the blanket, shaking his head. Sehun, even normally, is amazing. Sehun, trying so hard, practically making miracles happen, pushes at all of Tao's buttons. Tao's in constant danger of bursting from inside out, falling deeper and deeper in love with Sehun. It makes him want to hold him close all the time, makes him want to always feel him near by, so he can reach over and make sure Sehun's there.

"Seriously, this is already amazing," he says, pulling Sehun down to sit between his spread legs, Sehun's back against his chest. Sehun drops his head onto Tao's shoulder, looking up. "You're so good to me, Hun-ah."

"It's nothing," Sehun mutters. Their breathing is in sync as they watch the first of stars appear.

"Are you ..." Sehun trails of. "Are you happy? Because I am ... so happy. I'm so glad we're doing this trip, and I want to make sure you're too, that it's as good for you as it's for me."

Tao nuzzles his nose against Sehun's hair then moves a little so he can reach his face. The kiss lands on the corner of Sehun's eye.

"I'm always happy when I'm with you," Tao says.

Sehun's hand squeezes Tao's thigh.

When they notice a star falling after it gets completely dark, Tao wishes for Sehun to never leave his arms.

~~14\. go stargazing~~

~~38\. wish on a falling star~~

"What's up with you?" Tao asks, as they make their way back to their tent and Sehun is jittery. They're holding hands, and Sehun's palm is damp with sweat. Tao sees him craning his neck constantly in the beam of his flashlight.

"Shhhhhh," Sehun says. "Just one more thing. I want you to see one more thing." He stops abruptly then, and Tao barrels into his back. "Look," Sehun whispers. "They're here. I was afraid they'd be gone already."

The forest on their left, where Sehun's looking, glitters with hundreds of tiny lights.

"Fireflies," Tao gasps, in awe.

"Yeah, Yixing said that they only come out until like mid-July, so he wasn't sure if we'd see any."

Tao wraps his hands around Sehun's middle and drops a kiss at the nape of his neck. He's never seen fireflies before, even though he has so many memories of his mother telling stories about them before he went to bed. He's retold them to Sehun before, knows that Sehun remembers them. Now, he's standing here with Sehun. His heart is pounding in his ears, and he needs to hold onto Sehun so he knows it's real.

"I'm not dreaming?" he asks anyway, kissing Sehun's neck again, registering the goosebumps rising on his skin.

"No," Sehun says softly, covering Tao's hands on his waist with his own, and they stand in silence, watching, for a while.

"I didn't bring anything to catch them," Sehun says suddenly, his nails digging into Tao's skin in distress. Tao squeezes his waist tighter.

"It doesn't matter," he says, mouthing on Sehun's neck again. "I've caught them all. They're all in my heart, Sehunnie." He breathes in, nose in Sehun's hair. "It's all there," he says, not being able to say more. Sehun, and the fireflies, and this moment, this night―all of it is etched into Tao's soul, and he thinks he won't ever feel more in love, more shaken and more hopeful than he feels now.

"You're so cheesy," Sehun say, but he doesn't sound as blasé as he probably wanted to.

"Thank you," Tao whispers, holding Sehun close and watching the forest shimmer with light.

~~2\. catch fireflies~~

"So, do you think we lived Jeju enough?" Tao asks as they wait to board the ferry.

"Hmmmm," Sehun hums, "Let me think. We ate our weight in grilled black pig meat. You almost persuaded an old _haenyeo_ diver to quit her only source of living because you were so worried for her being in danger and then bought the rest of the abalone she was selling. You've made me get into a sea stark naked, though I'm still not a believer of your policy of 'the less clothes the better, no clothes the best,' mostly because my ass got scratched when we made out in the shallow water afterwards, and that's not cool. We've seen like every famous touristic place on this island, and you overcame your fears of haunted places and ghosts by walking through one harmless abandoned house while screaming like someone was cutting you to pieces. I think we did pretty well."

"You were sneaking behind me, it was dark, and the wind was practically howling in that place, you jerk," Tao says, and Sehun snickers.

"Whatever lets you sleep at night," he says.

Tao huffs, and they move in line. Only one more car, and it's their turn to board.

"You know," Sehun says, more quietly, fiddling with the radio. "Yesterday might have been our last sunrise on the beach."

Tao bites his lip, and Sehun's hand makes his way to his thigh. Tao squeezes it tightly.

"Sunsets are amazing, too," he says, but he knows that no matter what, the countdown has already started. His heart constricts, and he can't stop his mind from running away with him, thoughts of all the things he wants to keep ignoring, of all the unknown waiting for him back in Seoul, damping the mood.

 ~~15\. watch a sunrise on a beach~~ ~~IIII~~ IIII

 ~~21\. make out on the beach~~ ~~IIII~~ ~~IIII~~ II

~~34\. find a haunted house and walk through it~~

~~9\. go skinny dipping~~

The first raindrops fall just as they enter the tea plantation itself. It's been stuffy and overcast since morning, the storm hanging above their heads, but they've decided not to change their plans. Now, the rain is getting heavier by the minute. The weather's been mostly kind to them up till now, but this time it seems like it won't cut them any slack. Sehun, walking close enough next to Tao for their arms to brush, pulls out two thin transparent raincoats out of his backpack.

"It won't help much, but since we're here," he says, throwing his hand out to point at the plantation around them.

The green of the tea leaves, the cascades of them climbing up the hill, is still beautiful. They walk like this, getting soaked despite their raincoats, and the plantation empties as the rain thickens and the evening gets closer.

"I can't film anything like this," Tao complains, giving up on using even his phone camera for the day.

"Good, you can pay attention to me instead," Sehun says, resolutely, and it startles Tao.

"Do you think ... do you think that I don't?" he asks. He is paying attention though, of course he is. Sometimes he feels Sehun's the only thing he pays attention to at all, and the way Sehun's pouting at him now makes him wonder if he's that good at hiding it. Sehun's caught him looking before though, for too long or at things that shouldn't hold that much interest.

"Well, you can do it more now. Pay attention to me, only," Sehun says.

They've made it to the top of the hill now, the whole plantation on the palm of a hand, mists starting to slowly roll between the green, but Tao isn't really watching. Instead, he's looking at Sehun, at his wet cheeks and the way his upper lip is pulled into his mouth as if he was anxious.

"Should I call you cute, too?" he asks, suddenly remembering that night out drinking with Yixing, and Sehun's eyes dart away, like he's trying to hide something. Tao thinks it's more pleasure than annoyance at the term. He reaches for Sehun's hand, but doesn't do much more. He's still ... still not too sure about taking things from Sehun, still more sure when Sehun's the one that comes to him first, because then it's clear Sehun wants. Tao doesn't know if Sehun wants him always, just like Tao always wants Sehun, or if for Sehun it's just a thing to do, a spur of a moment decision or adrenaline rush or a convenient item on the list, something to make the trip more fun. So he just tangles their fingers together and looks more at Sehun's chest than into his eyes or at his lips.

Sehun gets what Tao would like to do anyway. He almost always does. He steps closer, nudging his nose against Tao's. They're practically alone now, and Tao presses their lips together, slips his hands under Sehun's raincoat, against his warm tummy, and sucks Sehun's tongue into his mouth. Kissing in the rain, kissing Sehun in the rain, is wonderful.

 ~~8\. kiss in the rain~~ III

The rain doesn't stop. It still pounds heavy against the windows of their room next morning, and their laundry is still wet on the back porch when Tao goes to check. He's glad this guest house let them use the washing machine last night, but now they're left with heaps of wet clothes and dreadful weather outside.

"I'm just not getting up then," Sehun states, still buried under the light blanket. Tao goes to talk to the guest house owner about staying one more night. He comes back with breakfast, and Sehun almost upends the tray that Tao just set down on the bed when he grabs for Tao and kisses him.

"Breakfast in bed. You have my love," he says. Tao freezes, and Sehun kisses him again, oblivious. When he pulls away, Tao searches for something to say, anything . . .

"Your breath kind of stinks," he comes up with.

"Shut up," Sehun retorts, grabbing the bowl of rice, but Tao notices his ears turning red.

 

Tao picks up his book after the breakfast while Sehun washes up and takes the empty tray down to the kitchen. When he comes back, he flops on top of the bed, head falling onto Tao's stomach.

"You're still reading that?" he asks, scratching at the book cover with his nails.

"Well, I almost never have the time, but I figured that now is the moment."

"No," Sehun says, grabbing the book and throwing it away. "I told you. Pay attention to me."

Tao looks down at him, shaking his head, and not really mourning the loss of the book. "Joonmyun will be upset if I return it damaged," he says anyway. He runs his fingers through Sehun's hair, and Sehun practically mewls. His hair's grown quite a bit by now, and the roots are showing, making his bleach almost as tacky as Tao's light green hair is.

"Why are you reading that anyway?" Sehun asks, eyes closed, hands playing with his own sleep shirt.

"I told you already," Tao starts, but the lie feels bitter on his tongue. He almost spills everything to Sehun now, but this moment too is too perfect for his worries and gloomy future.

"I don't believe you," Sehun says, opening his eyes and looking right up into Tao's soul. He leans up on his elbows and kisses Tao's collarbone where he reaches it, then uses one of his hands to pull Tao down into a kiss. His lips are so soft, and the kiss is slow, Sehun's tongue in Tao's mouth thorough, thick with things left untold. Sehun drops back down against Tao's stomach after a while.

"I'm going to sleep more," he says, turning and pressing his nose into Tao's stomach. He inhales deeply, Tao's shirt sticking to his lips, mumbles something about Tao smelling like tea and sea all at the same time, about him smelling good, and then he stays quiet, almost uncharacteristically still. Tao's book is too far away to reach, and much less interesting than Sehun sleeping in his lap.

"You're so cute," he tells Sehun, but Sehun doesn't seem to hear him anymore. Eventually, Tao carefully slides more down the bed, not wanting to jostle Sehun, and sleeps too.

20\. read a book

~~46\. cuddle on a rainy day~~

They don't leave the bed much that day. They watch some old drama rerun on TV then just stare out of the window at the ropes of water falling from the sky. They're never not touching, and Sehun's kisses turn hungrier later in the day. His hands dip under Tao's shirt and his fingers sink into Tao's navel then rub against his nipple. Tao lets him, touching too, taking his fill of Sehun's body, managing to spend minutes after minutes just kissing down his stomach, Sehun's t-shirt bunched up under his shoulders. Sehun's making these quiet little noises, content and growing only a little impatient when Tao gets stuck on one of his nipples or on a mole on Sehun's hipbone. He pulls Tao up by his hair after a long while, so they can kiss again, only now he has one leg hooked around Tao's thigh and his hips are jerking up, heat simmering, slow and steady.

They come like that, in their shorts, much later, when Sehun grips Tao's hips and his truths get faster, the drag of the fabric on Tao's cock a little painful. Sehun never stops kissing, and Tao swallows all his moans and incoherent babbling until all there's left are short gasps of breath and stickiness of the come on their clothes. Still, Sehun doesn't seem to plan on pulling away, nuzzling against Tao's neck and cuddling up to him some more, dozing off yet again.

It's Tao who ventures out for food, later, and comes back with snacks and a bucket of ice cream. Sehun's eyes light up. Their shorts are hanging, hand washed and dripping wet, in the bathroom, and there's a music program on TV. They spoon up the melting ice cream and mock the newest music acts and their costumes until their tongues are too frozen to talk. Sehun's cure to ice cream troubles is more kissing, and Tao lets it work.

~~23\. eat an entire bucket of ice cream~~

After the day that they spend on the rocky beach--Sehun pulling out the balloons he's bought some time ago and making Tao fill them up with water, then chucking basically all of them at him before Tao can even blink--Tao's list and their time left on the road gets alarmingly short. Tao's given up on finishing his book, burying it deep into his duffel bag and trying to bury his mounting insecurities with it. Sehun's been more in contact with Jongin and Chanyeol, already planning meet ups for when he's back in Seoul. He also talks with Joonmyun regularly, to make sure he has all the info and updates so he won't mess up on his first days. The bucket over Tao's head is almost full too, and Tao feels it tipping. His heart is too full of Sehun's laughter, off tune car singing and childish whining when he wants something, full of Sehun's relentless care and companionship. He doesn't know at all how he's going to deal with all this being taken away from him, with Sehun being swallowed by working life and occupied with his friends and family, snatched away from under Tao's touch.

He takes more and more videos of just Sehun, not even pretending to film the views and the interesting places in the background. Often he just stands a little away, watching Sehun fool around, enjoying life, sometimes purposefully showing off for Tao, sometimes pretending the camera doesn't even exist. They've taken so many selcas their common Instagram followers are starting to get annoyed, yet Tao wants more of it, wants to have every smile, every crinkle of Sehun's eyes, every moment they spend with their heads together and their hands clasped, documented. Sehun, who indulges his every whim, accommodating Tao's mood swings that are growing more extreme as they climb up the west coast towards Seoul, seems impossible to retain only in pictorial evidence, moving or not. The energy of him hands on, the pull he has on Tao―that's something Tao strives and fails to capture.

~~48\. have a water (balloons) fight~~

"What's going on?" Sehun asks as they turn off the main road and climb up one of the local ones, mostly gravel and remnants of mud.

"I wanted to do something," Tao says, trying to be cryptic. He can't be for much longer, but Sehun doesn't pry, only pulls all the windows down now that they're moving slowly. They get to the top of the hill, and Tao parks just off the road. The sun's set already, but the horizon is still a little pink. The view of the shore and small towns beneath them, fisher boats rocking in the waves, is amazing.

"Oh," Sehun whispers, giving Tao a questioning look.

"I have my ways," Tao just says, and lets Sehun watch the last of the day light disappear while he starts pulling things from the back of the car.

There's a bit of a clearing ahead of them, grass that tapers into a rock drop off. Tao spreads the blanket and puts down his boxes and a bag while Sehun watches silently. The paper lanterns are easy to put together, and Tao sets them around in the safe distance for when it gets dark. Only then food comes out, _kimbap_ and fancy finger food that will hopefully taste okay even cold. Tao's gotten a bottle of red wine and two glasses too.

"How's that for an outdoors dinner?" he asks.

Sehun's eyes widen. "Yeah," he says. "I think you can tick it off your list."

Tao's brows furrow a little because Sehun's tone is a bit demure and the mention of his list makes him think of all the times he didn't want it mentioned.

"That's not the main reason I'm doing it. I mean. You've done so much already, always thinking of things, and I wanted to do something for you too. This way I didn't have to look too far for an idea because I thought you'd like it, but I can think of something else. I just―"

Sehun's kissing him, arms looped behind Tao's neck.

"It's great," he says. "So shut up about the list already."

~~25\. have a romantic outdoor dinner~~

The fireworks are a little tricky to set off, later on, when the night has fallen and all the food is gone. Sehun doesn't bother to hide his amusement.

"You know, I knew a guy who burned his entire eyebrows off when doing what you're trying to do right now," he says, as Tao tries to light a colorful rocket stuck in the empty wine bottle. Sehun drank most of it, so Tao can drive them back down to the guest house they're staying in. His lips taste like bitter red wine now, and there's bit of color stuck on them too―Sehun's teeth probably look blue-ish from it.

Tao jumps back from the rocket when the wick finally catches on fire, moving quicker than he planned. Sehun laughs but then cheers in joy when the rocket shoots up and bursts into colors. Tao manages to set off two more like that and then gives Sehun a handful of firecrackers. They watch them burn together, standing side by side, Sehun's head on Tao's shoulder.

"I don't really like floating lanterns you know. They cause forest fires," Tao says, when the firecrackers are gone too. "So I thought I could cheat a little, like you with the ponies, and switch them up for these," he points at the simple lanterns spread around them. "But then. I don't know. I bought one."

Sehun chuckles.

"I appreciate you abandoning your principles for me," he says, and Tao doesn't bother to deny the last part.

"Good," he says, swallowing, and holds the lantern up for Sehun to light up.

"It feels a little lonely, by itself," Sehun says as they watch it float away.

Tao doesn't have words at the moment. He squeezes Sehun's waist, and Sehun moves so he's leaning against Tao's chest.

Even after the lantern is gone, the lights on the shore are beautiful, and they stay for a long time, wrapped up in one blanket, quiet and peaceful. Tao doesn't want to notice how the atmosphere turns serene with Sehun's thumb rubbing over Tao's knuckles under the blanket, and Sehun's lips pressed against his shoulder. He presses a kiss to the crown of Sehun's head and pushes everything but this moment away.

~~18\. release a floating lantern~~

~~41\. see fireworks~~ III + ~~_set fireworks off_ ~~

"You know, I think car sex is a bit like kissing on the Ferris wheel―it's mostly just myths based on wrong input information," Tao says, when Sehun knees him into the stomach as he tries to pull his own jeans down.

One moment, they were stopping at one of the coastal rest stops to watch the sunset, in the next one Sehun was pressed between Tao's spread legs, Tao leaning heavily against the hood of his car. Sehun's hands were under Tao's shirt, his lips sucking a bruise into Tao's collarbones, and his cock hard, pressing against Tao's.

Now, Sehun's scrambling off Tao and trying to slide to the front seat, laughing breathlessly and leaving Tao winded and confused at the back of his car.

"That was a way too coherent analysis for my taste," Sehun says. He pushes the driver's seat all the way to the back, reclining the back rest a little. The seat bangs into Tao's knees, and he hisses.

"Get up here, so I can ride you," Sehun says, collapsing on the passenger's seat for a moment, writhing out of his jeans and tossing his tank top to the back.

"You really want to have car sex with me?" Tao asks, incredulous, but he's scrambling to obey Sehun's instruction.

"Honestly, I'm surprised it took us this long to get to it. We should have broken the car in within week one." Sehun says, and the moment Tao flops onto the driver's seat, Sehun's tugging his jeans to mid-thighs, taking the boxers with them.

"You wanted to have car sex with me since week one?" Tao's brain to mouth filter has stopped working because Sehun's fingers are stroking up and down his cock.

"Yeah, I mean, didn't you?" Sehun tilts his head and _pouts_ , his thumb pushing into the slit of Tao's cock. "Actually, don't answer that. Just. Have you seen yourself when you drive this? Legs spread, shoulders wide, sunglasses on, all smug about being able to speed past anyone if you want to. It's hot," Sehun says, just as he straddles Tao's hips. Sehun's pupils are blown wide, and his cock is hard and leaking. Tao strokes it, tentatively, and Sehun swats his hand away, placing it on his hips instead.

"Now, it's a game. The horn can go off only after I've come," Sehun says, lifting a bit and leaning forward, resting his chin on Tao's shoulders. "Hold on."

Tao knows Sehun's working himself open with lubed fingers. He's seen him pull the lube from that love hotel they stayed in out of his back pocket. Their chests are pressed together, and Sehun's groaning right into Tao's ear, nipping on his earlobe at times. Tao can only help hold Sehun up, trembling in anticipation, their cocks pressed together between them. Sehun's fast and not at all tentative about this, and Tao feels it's too soon when Sehun detaches himself from him, lubing his cock quickly and sinking down on it in one swift motion.

"Fuck," Tao says, and Sehun hisses, but presses himself down a little more, firmly seated in Tao's lap. Tao's jeans must be scratching against his ass, and his face is scrunched up in concentration. "Fuck," Tao mutters again because Sehun's definitely been too fast about this. He slides his hands down to Sehun's ass cheeks, spreads them wide, to maybe help a little, and leans a bit forward to suck at Sehun's right nipple. Sehun's breathing calms down a bit after a moment, and his next groan is less pained and more eager again. He tries to roll his hips, but Tao stops him, nails digging into his skin and the heels of Tao's palms pressing into his hipbones.

"Give it time," he says against Sehun's chest, and Sehun whines but keeps still for a little longer.

"You feel so good in me," he whispers, after another deep breath, and pulls Tao up by his hair, licking into his mouth. "So, so good," he mutters into the kiss, and then he's lifting himself up and dropping down, and Tao can't stop him. It's frantic and a dizzying rush, and Sehun pushes Tao down into the seat, hands on his shoulders, as he rides him. Tao keeps his hands on Sehun's ass, so Sehun doesn't slide down his thighs. He wants to push back and fuck into Sehun from below, but he remembers the car's horn on the steering wheel, and Sehun's challenge, so he doesn't. Instead, he slips one hand between them, taking Sehun's cock in it and pulling. He rubs his palm over the head on every upstroke, and Sehun keens, getting louder, his movements messier.

"Please, please," he's saying, nails scratching over Tao's shoulder blades.

"I want to feel you come around me," Tao whispers, and pulls Sehun's bottom lip into his mouth, teeth sinking into it. Sehun does just that, come spilling over Tao's fingers. He shudders, still moving to ride it out.

Tao doesn't wait anymore. He pushes Sehun back, pressing him against the steering wheel and thrusting up. He forgets himself for a moment, holds Sehun's hips down as he thrusts up the best he can, and Sehun whines and sobs above him, saying "yes, fuck, _yes_ ," and then Tao's name, over and over again. The loud honk resounds around them as Sehun arches back more, and like this Tao can see his own cock disappearing inside Sehun. He's so close, and he wants to pull out, wants to push Sehun off him before it's too late, but Sehun wraps his fingers around Tao's wrists.

"No," he says, voice breaking, and he rolls his hips down once, the car horn going off one more time.

Tao comes, Sehun squeezing around him on purpose, and Tao's vision blurs on the edges, Sehun's flushed face, eyes closed, lips swollen, and a bruise forming on his neck the sole focus of Tao's being.

He squeezes Sehun's hips where he's still holding onto them, and Sehun laughs.

"I definitely don't think those car sex stories are myths," he breathes out.

 ~~16\. watch a sunset~~ III

Sehun pouts unhappily the entire time the hairdresser is coloring Tao's hair back to black.

"You know, I thought a production company and, like, TV station or such wouldn't be too strict on hair colors. Aren't you all artists in a way?" he asks.

"I hate to break this to you, but even if that was true, I wouldn't keep this ugly green hair," Tao says, and Sehun puffs his cheeks out.

"I don't know. Maybe I thought that as long as the hair stays, the trip hasn't really ended either," he says. In the end, once Tao is done, Sehun has his hair dyed too and even gets his eyebrows trimmed.

"Now, this is the end of an era," Tao jokes, aiming his rolling camera at Sehun's face and zooming in on the perfect arch of one freshly plucked eyebrow.

"Your interest in the state of my eyebrows is really touching," Sehun deadpans. Tao throws an arm around his shoulders.

"So Everland tomorrow?" he asks, and Sehun turns to him, surprised but clearly very pleasantly so.

"How did you know I'd want to go?" he asks.

"Sehun. You love amusement parks," Tao says. "And I figured since it's our last day tomorrow, we should end it on a high note." It's Wednesday, and Sehun starts his orientation on Monday, so there's really no more prolonging this trip. Sehun's mom has been asking Tao if he plans on ever returning her son for the past week or so, ever since they went over the five week mark. She means well and isn't really upset, but it has only served as another reminder of the clock ticking, the bucket swaying, too full.

So Tao has figured that it may be easier to cope with the impending loss in a loud amusement park full of rides that give people adrenaline rush, a park that is associated with having a good, _happy_ time.

Sehun pulls him out of his thoughts with a quick, excited hug, and then smirks at him. "For this you're even forgiven the dark boring hair."

"At least we're in it together," Tao says, and pulls at the shorts strands of Sehun's hair on his neck. Sehun huffs.

 

Tao was so very wrong. His stomach's been hurting ever since the morning. No mater how crazy the rides are, no matter how energetic Sehun is, pulling and pushing Tao around, Tao can't enjoy it as much as he should. He keeps thinking of how it's barely an hour long drive to Seoul from Yongin and how this is really it. He doesn't know why he thought spending the last day of the trip in a crowded place, where he doesn't even dare to hold hands with Sehun for too long, was a good idea. But he does try, for Sehun, and Sehun's excitement is still a bit contagious at times, Sehun's power over Tao's mood ever present.

When they pass by one of the gift shops on their way to lunch, Tao catches Sehun looking back at one of the plush bears with the Everland logo on it. He sends Sehun to stand in line for their food and claims he needs to visit a bathroom.

Sehun almost drops the freshly purchased fries and drinks when Tao joins him later, with a fluffy bear in his arms.

"For you, you big man-child," he says, and Sehun's jumping up and down in glee, shoving the drinks and the food at Tao, and snatching the bear.

"You," he starts, then bites his lip. "How about we get out of here," he says abruptly after he swallows, hugging the rather big bear in his arms and looking at Tao from behind it, his mouth not visible.

"But it's only noon," Tao protests.

"I know," Sehun shrugs. "Let me drive. I want to go to one more place."

Tao looks between their food and the bear, Sehun's fingers squeezing the plush of it rather viciously.

"That's perfectly fine with me." The only video Tao takes in Everland is Sehun walking out of there, hands full of bear and his steps light.

\+ ~~_go to an amusement park_~~

It's a pretty dreadful half an hour before Sehun takes an exit to Incheon instead of continuing towards the part of Seoul where he lives. The entire time Tao bites his bottom lip to not ask what is going on. His hands are curled into fists around the bottom hem of his t-shirt and his eyes are set on the road in front of them.

But after they cross the bridge to Incheon, the curiosity is too big to ignore, cutting even through the anxiety rising in Tao's stomach.

"Where are you taking me?" he asks.

"Muui-do," Sehun says, taking another turn that will take them towards the port.

Okay, so Tao knows the location, but, "Why?"

"Change of plans. I want to stay out one more night, and I used to come here when I was younger with my parents."

Tao watches Sehun's profile, Sehun's expression his default blank as he navigates towards the ferry terminal. Tao's heart is beating in his ears, and he's still so very nervous and on edge, but he laughs a little because he wants Sehun to know he's particularly happy about this turn of events.

"We're cutting it real close though," he says. "You need to call your mom."

"Yeah, I really do." Sehun nods. "So it's okay then?" he asks.

Tao squeezes his thigh and nods. "Whatever is fine with me."

 

They're lucky to find a free colorful beach hut in the first row on the beach, which makes Sehun squeal in happiness. They drop off a few of their things in the hut, and come out onto the beach just to notice the tide line descending.

"Mud fight," Sehun shouts, already barefoot and pulling his t-shirt off. Tao's chased deep after the retreating water, and ends up on his back in the mud, Sehun sitting on top of him and laughing wildly. Tao's laughing too, even if his eyes are prickling with tears--only because there are clamps digging painfully into his ass.

"You're crazy," he says to Sehun, and Sehun throws another fistful of mud at his chest and grins.

"Honestly, I was kind of bummed we missed the Mud Festival in Boryeong, but this totally is as good as that. I'm adding it to the list of things we've done."

Tao sighs, throwing his head back and watching the sky.

"You've truly liked that list, huh?" he says, because asking, 'Would you kiss me without it,' is too hard.

"Yes, I did," Sehun agrees, sliding away from Tao to lie next to him. "It will be such a pain in the ass to clean up after this."

\+ ~~_have a fight in the mud_~~

Once they're clean and fed, and Tao's filmed the mud planes slowly being swallowed by the ocean yet again, Sehun grabs his backpack from the hut. "We're making a time capsule," he says to Tao. "If you have anything you want in it, go fetch it."

It makes Tao laugh a little, how bossy Sehun sounds. He's also a little bummed he didn't know earlier, but he doesn't mind. He's gotten used to Sehun, the self proclaimed executive manager of The List. He rummages through his pockets and joins Sehun as they leave the beach and cross the road into the forest.

Sehun has a small metal box from candies they bought somewhere on the east coast in his bag, and once they manage to dig some semblance of a hole under a tree that Sehun marks, he opens it and sits cross legged in front of it.

"I know it's short notice, but do you have anything?"

Tao has a tiny strand of green hair that he asked the hairdresser for on impulse. Sehun laughs and claps like a seal when he realizes what it is. He pulls out a photo of them he must have had developed somewhere in the past few weeks, their heads together, green and blond, and only their eyes and noses visible. It's still clear they're laughing. Tao drops a ticket from Everland inside as well because he's still had it in the pocket of his jeans when they arrived at the island. Sehun does the same and that makes Tao laugh. He pulls out his guide book and tears out a page out of it, the one with the Daehan Dawon Tea plantation description. Sehun doesn't ask why. Somehow, for Tao, that was one of the best parts of this trip.

"You really caught me off guard," Tao sighs, "but look, I peeled a small part of the color off our hut to put in here too." Sehun's so gleeful about it, his laughter bright and happy.

"Okay, my turn," he says.

Tao's left speechless at the small pile in Sehun's hands. There's a ticket for the Ferris wheel they rode and a picture of Tao stuffing his face with hot dogs. There's a tea leaf from the plantation, and a burnt out firecracker. There's what feels like a small ensemble of tiny rocks and pebbles, and Sehun explains without prompting.

"This one is from around the waterfall in Jeju, and this one is from Mount Halla. This is from the pebble beach from the night before we went to Oedo, and this is from the penis park. I'm kind of sorry I didn't find one that looked like a penis, honestly."

Tao would laugh, but he's reliving all the things in flashbacks as he realizes Sehun's been collecting small souvenirs from all their adventures, and that's ... That's another thing to add to the pile of things Sehun does that make Tao's knees weak and his heart swell. He has tickets to several parks and shrines they've been to, and the bill from their bungee jump too, and pictures of Tao or both of them together, lazy on a beach, victorious after some hike, a picture of just the hammock they've slept in. There's a dried out flower that Sehun claims is from Oedo, and sand from the first beach they watched the sunrise on.

"Sehun, this is ..." Tao trails off.

"I know the pictures won't last, but ..." Sehun shrugs and pulls out one more piece of paper. It's the list, but it's not Tao's version, it's Sehun's, copied in hurried writing, with things added to it and comments about where the list items happened, notes on what Sehun should do to make certain parts of the list work, his own secret project as it unfolded. "At least when we'll go through the faded out pictures and a set of random rocks later, we'll know what it was all about. Or this might fade too," Sehun says. Tao wants to kiss him so much right now.

"I think the song writing is one of the very few things on the list we didn't accomplish," he says, a little startled by that.

Tao doesn't want to tell him about three verses of rap set to the thrum of Sehun's fingers on the steering wheel as he drove on evenings that are on a piece of paper in his back pocket. They're sappy and too revealing. Sehun looks away for a moment, searching for the lid on the ground, and Tao slips the song in too. If he's lucky enough, these words too will fade away with time. It strikes him that they might never come back for the box, even if Sehun seems almost certain that they will. He bites his lip, watching Sehun close the box, memories of one summer reduced to a rattling trinket, so heavy and dear and enormous.

"You should have ripped out a page of that book you never finished too," Sehun says, a bit hesitant. He looks like he wants to say more but drops it, instead focusing back on the box. "You're awfully quiet," he ads, as he places it down into the hole.

"I'm really glad we got to do this," Tao whispers, and Sehun licks his lips in a sign of nerves before he nods and throws the first pile of soil on top of the box.

When it's safely under the ground, they stand up, and Sehun reaches for Tao's hand. Tao lets him, squeezing tightly, and looking down at how their hands fit together.

"Sehun," he says when they start walking back. "I quit my job before we left in June. There's no sabbatical leave." It's one heavy stone dropping off his chest, one of many, but he needs to tell Sehun at some point. He's not proud of keeping quiet this long. He just didn't want to deal with it.

"I know," Sehun says, after a moment of silence, squeezing Tao's hand harder.

"You know?" Tao sounds as panicked as he feels.

"Well, I kind of guessed. I mean, your boss never sounded so kind as to give you a long sabbatical leave with no definite end, and you took the fern with you. I fucking gave it to you when you started working there," Sehun says, exasperate. "I couldn't be sure, and I tried to ask a few times, but you never seemed to want to talk about it. I figured you'd tell me eventually. Just," he pauses. "Why didn't you tell me?" he sounds a little hurt.

"I ... I don't know," Tao says. Because he didn't want pity and he didn't want it looming above both of them. He knows, that Sehun secretly worries a lot, and now he just feels worse because Sehun probably did worry anyway, and he couldn't talk about it because Tao kept him out. "I'm sorry. I first thought about doing this trip after I heard about the situation with your job from Joonmyun. I was already thinking about quitting for some time then. So I did, but I didn't want it to sound like I quit just to do this. This trip wasn't about that." This trip was about Sehun, and maybe Tao screwed that up by keeping silent.

"Are you ... are you going to be okay?" Sehun asks, as they cross the road and start walking between the rows of huts towards their own. He stops abruptly and turns on his heel. "Fuck, you're not leaving, right? You're not going back to China, are you?" Tao sees the panic rising in Sehun's eyes, and he shakes his head quickly, a little overwhelmed by the storm of emotions raking through Sehun, messy and unreadable.

"No. I mean. It is an option, but it's like the last resort. I want to stay, but I don't know how long I can if I don't figure things out."

"This better fucking not be a good bye trip," Sehun says, and he sounds angry.

"It's not," Tao promises. At least not the way Sehun's asking about. He should say 'I promise it's not', but it's stuck in his throat.

"You'll figure it out. I'll help. I'll make you read Joonmyun-hyung's entire library if needed," Sehun says suddenly, and Tao can see the wheels in his head turning fast. "We'll look at ads and not just hiring, but we'll look if people are looking for independent film makers for their projects or something. I'll help you pimp out your résumé."

Tao hugs Sehun before he loses the nerves. He holds him close, Sehun's nose pushed against the pulse point under Tao's chin, until Sehun stops blabbing and just inhales, slowly, deeply.

"I'm sorry I worried you," Tao says. "Thank you for worrying."  
  
~~44\. write a song~~

~~43\. make a time capsule~~

They sit in the open door to their hut, listening to the sea washing over the shore and watching the stars above it. There's a bonfire a little away from them, and they can hear someone play a guitar. Tao's been nursing the same beer since before dinner and so has Sehun. They're warm and mostly taste awful now, but it's something to do with hands, something to hold on to. Sehun's head drops to Tao's shoulder as the time passes, and the beach empties out completely, the night falling heavy and quiet.

"I don't want to go to sleep yet," Sehun murmurs. Tao's put the beer away some time ago and uses his free arm to pull Sehun closer by his waist.

"You're already dozing off," he points out. "Just let it happen."

"Want to keep you company," Sehun says. He shakes his head, bumping into Tao's chin. Tao jerks back, his teeth rattling, and Sehun giggles a little.

"Sorry," he mutters, looking up and kissing Tao's jaw. "Better now?" he asks.

Tao slips his hand into Sehun's hair instead of a reply, sliding his fingers through the strands that have gotten longer by now. Sehun reaches up for another kiss, right on the lips, slow and languid.

 

The blanket they received when checking in and their sleeping bags are creased underneath Sehun's naked body, and they keep on bunching up as he arches off them and thrusts into Tao's mouth. He has a fist in his mouth because they can't be too loud, not here, with other tourists sleeping in tiny huts just meters away. His other hand is in Tao's hair, and when Tao sucks, hard, cheeks hollowing, Sehun's grip gets tighter and his hips snap a little faster. Tao lets out a choked off moan, the head of Sehun's cock hitting the back of his throat, and Sehun comes. He whines louder around his fist, and Tao hears him breathing hard and fast through his nose. He slides his lips up and licks at the tip of Sehun's cock, kissing down the underside before he's pushed off and then pulled up.

"Where's the lube?" Sehun asks, peppering Tao's face with kisses and finally sucking on Tao's tongue, humming into the kiss as he spreads his legs and pulls Tao between them. Tao searches for the lube that Sehun's dropped somewhere by his head earlier. He squeezes the tube in his hand for a while, buying time while they continue kissing. He's so hard, and his cock rubs against Sehun's tummy as Sehun keeps squirming. He scratches down Tao's back, across his ass, and grabs it to push them closer together.

"Want you," Tao whispers then, against the shell of Sehun's ear. He reaches for Sehun's hand, pulling it away from his ass, and he presses the lube into his hand. Sehun gives him a confused looked, and Tao rolls off him, lying on his stomach and jutting his ass up. "Want you to fuck me," he clarifies, watching Sehun. He knows he's flushing, and it's weird, lying down like this, ass up in the air, because Sehun only stares, swallowing around nothing. Sehun's Adam apple bobs, and he finally moves, running his free hand over the scratches he's made down Tao's ass. Tao shivers, bites his tongue not to beg because this wonder in Sehun's eyes only makes him want this more. He wants to feel Sehun in him, hot and throbbing. He knows it will be good, Sehun's cock head sliding against his prostate. "Please," he whispers, when Sehun only continues to touch the marks he's left on Tao tonight.

"Fuck," Sehun says at last, a sharp inhale of breath, and the way he sounds, wrecked and wanting, forces Tao more onto his knees, legs spreading in offering. "Okay, okay," Sehun mutters, moving to kneel behind Tao.

Sehun's fingers are slim and long, and once he gets two pressed into Tao, it's torture. He keeps switching between quick and shallow thrusts, thumb pressed against the rim from the outside, and deep and slow ones, with more power and pads of his fingers scratching Tao's inner walls as he pulls back. Tao's on his knees and elbows by now, pushing back and moaning into Sehun's discarded shirt that he found in his scramble. It smells like Sehun, and it already feels like Sehun's everywhere around Tao, even before he starts sucking bruises into the skin stretching over Tao's ribs.

"You feels so good around my fingers," Sehun says, breathless and still a little awestruck, and Tao squeezes around him on purpose.

"Just," he groans when Sehun's fingers press right against his prostate with the next, deeper thrust. "I'm so close," he mutters, "You need to fuck me." Tao's cock is heavy between his legs, precome in a wet patch where it brushes the blanket underneath them. His thighs are starting to tremble, and Sehun's only now pushing the third finger in. He stops then, moves so that his chest presses against Tao's back.

"Just a little longer," he whispers, tongue circling Tao's earrings then sliding down to his shoulder, nose pressed into the back of Tao's neck. Sehun waits for Tao to come down a bit, the building pressure retreating a little, but Tao's still too tense, stomach cramping as he tries to squeeze around Sehun again. His legs give out on him, and he flattens on his stomach. Sehun spreads his fingers a little inside him, his other hand massaging Tao's lower back as Tao sobs with need. Finally, Sehun's fingers pump in and out of him, only a few more times before he pulls them away.

Sehun pushes at Tao's shoulder, trying to make him turn around, but Tao shakes his head, folding his knees underneath himself again, his cheek flattened against the floor. He knows he's a wreck, and every time Sehun touches him, it feels good and hurts a little. He can't hide it, can't hide the way he's so shaken now, and he doesn't want Sehun to see. "Just do it like this," he tries to say, when Sehun kisses one of his ass cheeks, coaxing him to move in low murmur.

"Fine," Sehun says, voice hoarse, and then he's pushing in. Everything is still for a moment before Sehun pulls out and thrust in, sharp and hard. Tao hiccups, and his knees slide wider. "Fuck," Sehun swears behind him, and the next time he presses in, Tao tries to meet him. It's a quick rhythm from the start, both of them too wound up to make it last. Tao's moans are loud now, despite the efforts to muffle it. The pleasure is coiling in the pit of his stomach, and Sehun feels good, so good, the slick slide of his cock, the almost constant pressure against Tao's prostrate, and the hard line of Sehun's hips against his ass.

"Hun," he whispers, knowing he can't hold himself up anymore, and Sehun presses against the small of his back, pushes him flat against the floor, Tao's thighs squeezed tight together by Sehun's own. It's frantic now, no pace and all Sehun, Tao's cock dragging against the scratchy blanket as his ass jiggles with Sehun's thrusts.

"Going to--" Sehun whispers, his forehead pressed against Tao's back now, "so good, I--"

"Come, Sehunnie," Tao manages to say, arching a little.

"You too," Sehun mutters, his next thrust pushing them both up the mattress. Sehun bites down onto Tao's shoulder, hard, and Tao comes, muscles tensing. Sehun's breath hitches, and he comes too with his next press into Tao, just like that, his cock pulsing as he rides it out, small jerks of his hips and mewls pressed into Tao's skin.

They don't get up. Tao's too boneless to move, his emotions going haywire, and his heart not wanting to calm down. Sehun doesn't pull out, just moves so he's covering Tao's back with his chest. He kisses Tao's shoulder blade, hand massaging Tao's scalp until Tao turns a little and Sehun can kiss up until he reaches the corner of his mouth. The kiss is sloppy, and Sehun's heavy and sticky against Tao's back, but at least this way, Tao knows he's here, with him, in him, around him. When Sehun moves a little and pulls Tao so that this time, it's Tao in Sehun's arms, Tao lets himself fall asleep, too exhausted in every sense of the word.

 ~~14\. go stargazing~~ III

The journey to Seoul is short and quiet. Sehun plays his favorite songs from his summer play list, skipping between them, and Tao keeps his eyes on the road, one track mind so he doesn't drive them off the road.

When the moment comes, the awaited drop of the bucket of things unsaid, cold as ice on the back of Tao's neck, it's not really dramatic. It's Sehun unplugging his iPod from Tao's radio and opening the door on the passenger side of the car. It's Tao helping him with the duffel bag and the few souvenirs he's bought for the family and shutting the trunk when all his things are out of it.

Sehun smiles. Tao's knees are weak. "Thanks for taking me along, again," Sehun says.

"No problem," Tao answers, throat dry. "Say hello to your mom for me."

"Do you want to come in? She'd love to see you."

Tao shakes his head. "I've hogged you long enough. I don't want to intrude."

Sehun rolls his eyes. "You never do. Call me, okay?"

Tao nods. "Sehun," he starts, but then only gives him a quick hug. "You'll be awesome on Monday."

Sehun nods, smile growing a tiny bit wider, and walks to the door of his house. He pulls out his keys, and when he disappears inside, wanting to surprise everyone, Tao drives away while he still can. He doesn't turn on his camera at all, this time.

 

Sehun calls on Monday, in the evening, and Tao doesn't pick up. He's going through all his footage, has been doing so ever since he's got home, only stopping to do his laundry. It's a mess. He's wanted to cut it into a short movie about road tripping around South Korea, but Sehun's everywhere, the main hero that Tao never meant to cast.

Tao wishes for many things as he cuts and edits and forgets all about looking for a new job. Most of all, he wishes his summer list has never existed.

Two weeks later, Tao still hasn't returned any of Sehun's missed calls. They stopped coming after day ten. Tao misses Sehun's constant presence in his life, his touch and his scent and his taste, his warmth and laughter, and his energy that is contagious. He misses the way he's felt like nothing could go wrong when he was with Sehun. He dusts off his YouTube account and posts the video that he's cut―trying all the things he wasn't allowed to do at his job and spending hours and hours on music and the perfect sequence of the scenes. All the while, he wonders if Sehun's doing well. He must be busy now, new colleagues and old friends, and all the changes that come with working full time. Tao opens the job listings and ponders why he's never asked Sehun if he meant all the kisses.

 

Chanyeol calls the next day, and he sounds a little upset.

"I'm glad you live," he says. "We thought you dropped off the planet Earth."

"I've been ... busy," Tao say.

"Doing what? I hear you quit your job."

"Sorting things out," Tao says, and it's true, in a way.

"Ah," Chanyeol sounds like a cat that got the cream. "Now, I'm glad to hear that. Maybe you can sort that thing where your phone doesn't let Sehun's phone calls through too, then."

Tao bites his lip and stays silent.

"Look. I don't know what's wrong. I guess I could understand if you had a bit of a cabin fever after six weeks―"

"That's not it at all," Tao protests, jumping in.

"Then what is it?" Chanyeol sounds impatient. "I mean Joonmyun-hyung called Jongin who called me. He says that Sehun's a bit of a zombie and you two are not talking."

"I ... I'm ..."

"You're being uncharacteristically inconsiderate towards your best friend. To put it nicely," Chanyeol says. "Jongin isn't such a diplomat, so he says you're being an ass."

"I'm in love with him, but I think we've just had a summer fling, and those are not supposed to last. I don't want to drag him down into my problems now that the summer's over," Tao blurts out.

Chanyeol is silent for a moment then clears his throat. "Of course you're in love with him. I mean, you've been dating since his year one in college," he says.

"We haven't," Tao rolls his eyes a little. "We've been over this a million times. We haven't met until your math class, and we only made out back then because we wanted you to notice us. I don't know what we were thinking, but ..."

"I know this. I still insist on what I just said," Chanyeol interrupts. "I have to go. Call me later if you need me to explain in detail."

 

Tao's video gets over twenty thousand views in the first two days. It's a little overwhelming, and Tao's not sure how it went viral like that, so he watches it again. And again. And again.

His phone rings that evening, and when he sees the name on display, he picks up this time.

"Can we meet?" he asks instead of greeting before Sehun can get a word in.

"Where?" Sehun asks, quietly.

"That Bugak Skyway overlook. Whenever you're free."

"Tomorrow at ten at night," Sehun suggests.

"Yeah, that's fine," Tao says, thinking of how that gives him time to clean up and make sure this time he asks all the right questions.

"Okay, okay," Sehun says, sounding a bit relieved.

"Talk to you then," Tao says. Sehun hums and hangs up.

 

Sehun looks good. He must have a had a long day at work though because he's still in fitting slacks and a dress shirt, shiny new shoes and hair styled up, looking the part of young auditor in the biggest audit firm on the South Korean market. Tao thinks how hugging him now would wrinkle his shirt beyond repair.

"I'm glad you're okay," Sehun says instead of greeting, eyes roaming over Tao as if checking for damage.

"I am, I just ... I'm sorry," Tao mutters. The guilt washes over him because of course Sehun was worried about him. "I just didn't know what to do for a bit there."

"I told you I'd help," Sehun insists, looking hurt now.

"No. I mean yes. But that's not it."

"Then what is it?" Sehun asks, scooting closer. He doesn't hesitate to lean against the hood of Tao's car, and it feels starkly familiar. They've spent plenty of times like this at rest stops and overlooks with a great view, just like this one.

"Why did you kiss me?" Tao asks, slowly.

"Why did you never kiss me first?" Sehun retorts. "I mean all these people on YouTube say you love me, but how would I know?" Sehun's rubbing at his neck nervously, licking his lip, and Tao is still processing Sehun's words.

"You've found my video?" he asks, stepping forward and into Sehun's space. Sehun's legs automatically fall apart, and Tao's drawn closer, watching Sehun's face carefully.

"Of course I did. I was worried sick about you not picking up your phone, not calling me or messaging me, or anyone else. I went through all your social media every day for a sign of movement, and I was thinking of going to your place after work the day it got posted."

Tao's hands slide to rest on Sehun's hips.

"I do love you," he says. He's realized just how much in the past few days. While he watched the final product of his own editing again and again, it has felt like an out of body experience. He feels stupid for pulling away when he should have been making Sehun fall head over heels for him too, so they can have their 'cute young love' that everyone's so excited about after watching his video.

"I really do," he whispers, and kisses Sehun. Because Sehun's looking at him with shining eyes, and it's still the same Sehun who Tao's spent so much time with, just the two of them for days and Tao never getting enough of him. It's his Sehun, even under all these fancy clothes, and he feels soft and perfect, and in Tao's reach, indulging Tao's need to touch just like he always has.

It's Sehun who turns the kiss from soft to rough and dizzying, biting at Tao's bottom lip and pulling at his hair until they're both breathless.

"Which time?" he asks against Tao's mouth, and Tao doesn't catch on. "Which kiss do you want to know about?" Sehun asks again.

"There were different reasons?" Tao blurts out.

The corner of Sehun's mouth twitches a little. "Well obviously. Sometimes, I kissed you because you looked hot. Sometimes I kissed you because you looked cute. Sometimes I just kissed you because it sounded like a good idea or because you looked like you wanted to kiss me, or I wanted to shut you up. There's probably more, so you should be more specific."

"What about the ones that you checked off my summer list?"

Sehun's mouth falls open a little, and he hits Tao's shoulder.

"Are you dumb? Are you implying I did all that just because it was on some list?"

Yes, it sounds dumb, but Tao's been so swept up and so unable to read Sehun on this, even if he's gotten good at recognizing almost all of his moods and tells over the years. He's been so wrapped up in his worries, unable to look at the two of them the way his camera recorded their story in between the lines.

"Yes, I probably am. Tell me anyway."

Sehun grabs him by his cheeks and kisses him instead. "The list is gone," he says, when he pulls away, holding onto Tao so they're looking into each other's eyes. "And I'm still kissing you. I've spent the last two years missing you, thinking about how much I love you, so don't you dare think I didn't want to kiss you. I did all of that for me, and the list was just a selfish excuse. It was easier when I had leverage. Especially when you were trying to be dumbly valiant and left me be the one that always had to ask first. Do you understand?"

Tao nods, leaning in to kiss the corner of Sehun's lip. It's silly how much he understands the insecurities of not knowing where one stands, what place one has in someone's heart. Sehun's a little mad with him right now, but Tao can probably fix that. He rubs their noses together. "I love you," he says again.

"You better, I mean we've been dating all summer, and I'm irresistible," Sehun mumbles.

Tao laughs. "Next time you need to tell me."

"What next time? You better not break up with me, Huang Zitao. Ever."

Tao can't stop smiling. He presses closer to Sehun, leaning against him heavily because he's still trembling, and it's not safe to just stand on his own two feet. Holding a pouting, grumbling Sehun who is in love with him and wants all the touches Tao's offering is a new kind of rush and emotions, one Tao's thrumming with a bit too much. So he kisses Sehun again to cover it up.

 

"By the way," Sehun says, later, when Tao's jaw throbs in dull pain from too much kissing. "I got you a job offer. One of our clients needs to shoot a spot about their charity programs, and they're looking for someone who does things with _feelings_. I obviously couldn't give them your portfolio, so I linked them your summer video yesterday, and they want your number."

"You did what?" Tao chokes out.

"Whatever, that video is like a hot trend among all out interns. I already have to live with it. My face is like the new definition of everyone's summer pipe dreams." Sehun frowns. Tao is probably smiling too cockily now, but he can't help it. He's too happy to keep it in.

"A job offer?" he muses.

"Clearly, loving me has many benefits," Sehun says, nodding smugly. Tao leans across the gear shift and kisses the look off his face.

"I'm not so sure about that. You should come out with me tomorrow and try to give me a list of them for me to evaluate."

Sehun snorts. "No worries. We'll go through it, point by point."

end

 

 **A/N:** This fic was my baby, so please treat it kindly. I did a lot of research, so most of the places exist or it should at least be possible for them to exist in SK.

Here, [have a map](https://www.google.com/maps/d/edit?mid=zWOoc4hqT2Os.kpJlttmZDQsw) that I created as an aid for me when writing.

Also, if you missed it, this is their [song of the summer](http://vimeo.com/25370939).

And lastly, here [have Tao's final version of the summer list.](http://www.evernote.com/l/AYjM9YMekuJG568iFAQL02ncF6bIEqpzFJI/)

I researched this, and unless you want Dr. Pepper or unless you're in, like, Seoul and Bussan, it is, or it at least used to be, hard to find decent root beer.

This is the longest fic I've ever published, I had a beta and she caught a lot, but I have no illusions. If you see any typos or other mistakes, please do point it out!!!

Agh, what to do? I just had a lot of feelings and there has been a lot of frustration when it was posted, but it is now over. Thank you to Riha and Sheryl, my cheerleader and beta reader.  
  
I hope you all had fun reading <3


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